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Dr Ashish

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 11, 2023

Ashish Sehgal has over 20 years of experience as a counsellor. He holds a doctorate in neuro linguistic programming, mental health and social welfare.He is certified in neurolinguistics by both the Society of NLP and the American Board of NLP.... more
Debajit Question by Debajit on Mar 03, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Hello Sir/ Ma'am I am 43 in the teaching profession based in Guwahati and had a late marriage at 40 years with a teacher girl aged 5 years younger to me. We have a 2.5 years old cute male child and I love my wife.But my in-laws have insulted my parents and my wife's 3 sisters interferes too much in our personal life and strangely my wife has turned a blind eye to all these.For example recently wife's younger sister texted me "are you nuts" which is not acceptable as I am elder. Things are going for the worse now. My patience is being tested. Please help.

Ans: It's understandable that you're feeling frustrated and upset about the situation with your in-laws and your wife's sisters. It can be difficult to navigate family dynamics, especially when there are conflicts and misunderstandings involved.

First and foremost, it's important to communicate your feelings to your wife in a calm and respectful manner. Let her know how her family's behavior is affecting you and your relationship, and encourage her to work with you to establish healthy boundaries with her family.

It's also important to set clear boundaries with your in-laws and your wife's sisters. Let them know that their behavior is not acceptable and that you expect to be treated with respect. Be firm but polite, and try to avoid escalating the situation with anger or aggression.

If the situation continues to escalate or you feel like you're not able to resolve the conflicts on your own, it may be helpful to seek the guidance of a professional counselor or mediator. They can provide you with strategies for managing difficult family dynamics and help you and your wife work together to strengthen your relationship.

Remember that building strong, healthy relationships takes time and effort. It's important to be patient and persistent, and to continue to communicate openly and honestly with your wife and her family.

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Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 23, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 19, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Madam, I am 61 years old , retired from Govt service an year ago. I have a problem in my family. Though my wife is a post graduate, she refused to take up any Job and wants all others including her in laws to give her money eternally. Misbehaved with my parents & sent them out of our house for their supposed conservative style and refused to allow my sisters family on a visit and quarreled with me on this ground time & again. She quarrels with me on silly issues loudly infront of kids. She reflects her mother`s attitude in dealing with my parents & relatives. Later She re-started her love affair with her ex lover . Fed up with quarrels at home and keep her away from unwarranted affairs, I decided to go abroad and took her also with me with our 2 daughters. There again, she started another illicit affair with my classmate cum colleague (whom i knew for 2 decades and i treated like a brother and was already married with kids). After 18 months of secret affair , behind me, they finally disclosed and wanted to elope leaving their families behind. Stunned by their ghastly betrayal , I sent my family back to India and also reported the matter to boss, who repatriated that Traitor back. I had to forgive my wife for sake of my Daughters who were aged 12 yrs and 9 yrs then. I am unable to come to terms with their ghastly actions though 2 decades have since passed. We sleep in separate rooms and I have no physical relation with her, ever since as our marriage is over for all purposes. I believe that mutual Trust & respect are the foundations of any marriage. Both are lost in our case. Now my daughters aged 31, 29 are Post graduates but are sitting idle at home wasting time in TV and refuse to do any job as their mother keeps telling them why should women work ?. They refuse to receive any external counselling nor willing to get married nor take up a job nor pursue any studies. They are financially dependent on me. I am now retired and live on Govt Pension. They refuse to understand the reality around them. They have no friend either in Relatives or in their college circles. What to do with their Intransigence? .
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
At 61, you look back and reflect; what choices have you made that has led you to be where you are right now?
Have those choices robbed you of your peace of mind and a better life?
If Yes, it still isn't late to rework and revisit those choices and make better ones.

But for that, this obsession with their ghastly affair must end. The more you are focused on the past, it becomes difficult to create anything beautiful for today and tomorrow. Yes, you felt hurt and were in pain, but to continue to feel the pain is a choice and that is only going to make you more bitter. Consider what is happening with your marriage; you might have to accept that this is the way it will be. If you are not happy with this, then think of what you want to do about it.

It's a good thing that you have begun to focus on your children. They seem to be in need of focus and direction. Since they are adults, it's time you gave them an ultimatum to find a job and move out of home. It sounds cruel, but at times, as a parent you need to do the right thing for your children. So, act NOW and without hesitation.
As for you, as you decide what you want to do with your marriage, involve yourself in social circles and hobbies, travel etc. It will give you a distraction and also a way to calm your mind to take decisions.

All the best!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1679 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 08, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
My wife got posted in distant place 10 years back. I had to ask for help from my inlaws as our child was very young. They started to live with her. After 1 year she got transferred back to the place where I was living. She got a flat from the company and we started to live together. Since then my inlaws are also staying with us. They purchased another flat nearby but are not willing to move there. Now, the problem is that whenever me and my wife have a quarrel she just stops talking and starts to take decisions in consultation with my inlaws. I am completely out of the loop in these circumstances. Over the years my relationship with inlaws has gone sour and quarrels with wife have been lasting longer (upto 2 months). My inlaws are otherwise well behaved but their presence somehow is hindering the process of natural reconciliation between me and my spouse or I am perceiving the situation incorrectly. Please guide
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What you all have done is jumped impulsively into one situation, made it comfortable asking people to help and then jumped back into the original situation and not knowing how to ask the same people to stay away!
Your wife has to grow out of her parents being around and you have to understand that your in-laws have got used to stepping in while you were away.
It's about time that you and your wife had a mature conversation on how to manage your family yourselves and be responsible for raising your child. But do remember to deal with your in-laws carefully. After all, they gracefully kept their lives on hold to help your wife and your child. Without hurting their sentiments, you are going to have to convey to them that you are thankful for what they have done for you BUT now you would like to be there for your family. Initially, this will hurt them and your wife, but anymore of this game will pull you and wife away from one another. So, they do need to move out...
You are not cutting strings but simply loosening the grip it currently has which is unhealthy for your marriage. Hope that your wife also understands this which means she will put you to test and in her mind or vocally compare what you bring to the table and how her parents supported her. Bear with it and as the two of you work together in putting the family back together, she will eventually understand that this is for the best.

All the best!

..Read more

Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10349 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 18, 2025

Career
Good evening sir I have not attempted jee can I get admission in jamia hamdard on the basis of class 10 and 12 marks
Ans: Ansub, Admission to Jamia Hamdard’s BTech and most core technology, engineering, and medical programs is not possible only on the basis of Class 10 and 12 marks. Jamia Hamdard requires all candidates for these courses to appear for an entrance exam, typically JEE Main, NEET, or CUET, depending on the course. Only a very limited set of non-professional programs (such as BCA, BA, BCom, and some certificate/diploma courses) offer merit-based entry through marks obtained in Class 12 in the best of five subjects; these do not include BTech or other mainstream engineering programs. The university states that direct admission without any entrance exam is not offered for professional undergraduate courses including engineering, pharmacy, or medicine. For BSc, BCA, or BA, selection may be based on Class 12 marks and eligibility, but for anything in engineering or technology, an entrance test score is mandatory. If there are fewer qualified entrance test applicants for a specific program, only then may leftover seats (rare cases) be filled on merit from qualifying exam marks, and this is not an open, standard route.

Recommendation:
If you are seeking admission to Jamia Hamdard for engineering, pharmacy, or medicine, you must take the relevant entrance exam; for BCA and select general degree programs, Class 12 merit may suffice. Always check the course-specific eligibility on the official university website. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10349 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 17, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir my aunt is a married woman.Due to family pressure she wasn't able to complete her graduation in political science.But now she is interested in psychology but due to family related issues she will not be able to attend classes regularly.Is there any institution where she could do distance learning at low costs considering she is from Hindi medium background? She says she would love to be a mentor.Are there online jobs available for mentors?
Ans: Several open universities in India offer affordable, flexible distance-learning programs in psychology tailored for Hindi-medium students. The Indira Gandhi National Open University (IGNOU) provides a Bachelor’s in Arts with Psychology elective and a Master’s in Arts in psychology through its School of Social Sciences at annual fees under ?10,000, with course materials in Hindi and regional support centers nationwide. Annamalai University and Nalanda Open University similarly deliver BA and MA psychology degrees via printed and online content in Hindi, EMI payment options, and minimal residency requirements. These institutions are UGC-DEB accredited, ensuring degree recognition and transferability. Quality online platforms such as SWAYAM-NPTEL supplement foundational coursework with free psychology modules from premier IITs, offering certificates upon nominal exam fees. Key institutional aspects include recognized accreditation for credibility; comprehensive curricula covering developmental, social, and clinical psychology; multilingual study materials and student counseling services; affordable fee structures with payment flexibility; and robust learner support through online forums, recorded lectures, and regional study centers. For mentorship roles, online tutoring portals like Vedantu, Chegg, and UrbanPro recruit subject experts as mentors, offering flexible, work-from-home opportunities where she can leverage her sociopolitical background to guide students in psychology and related humanities subjects. UpGrad and LearnVern host mentorship and peer-coaching roles, often remunerated per session. These platforms require minimal technical setup and provide training on pedagogical methods and platform usage. They value clear communication skills, foundational subject knowledge, and the ability to engage learners remotely. Building a mentor profile on LinkedIn and professional tutoring networks like Preply can also attract clients seeking personalized guidance. This approach combines low-cost academic credentials with viable online mentoring opportunities, enabling her to pursue psychology education and a parallel mentoring career without regular campus attendance.

Recommendation:
Enroll in IGNOU’s BA or MA psychology for accredited, Hindi-medium distance education at minimal cost, and register as a mentor on platforms such as Vedantu or Chegg to secure flexible online tutoring roles. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Asked by Anonymous - Aug 18, 2025Hindi
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Hiii My daughter got admission pvt college in cse but we don't have any engineering background what should we do how she learns coding any suggestions???
Ans: As a parent of a CSE student without an engineering background, your daughter can excel in coding through strategic use of recognized online certification platforms and structured learning pathways. NPTEL offers government-backed certifications from IITs/IISc at extremely affordable rates (?1,000 per exam), with courses like "Programming in Java," "Data Structures and Algorithms," and "Database Management Systems" providing strong foundational knowledge. Coursera features university-level courses including Google Data Analytics Certificate (?3,000-4,000/month), IBM Data Science Professional Certificate (?3,500/month), and specialized programming courses from top universities, all of which are highly valued by employers globally. edX provides certificates from MIT, Harvard, and Microsoft at similar pricing (?2,500-5,000/month), covering computer science fundamentals, Python programming, and AI/ML concepts. GeeksforGeeks offers practical coding practice platforms and industry-oriented content crucial for placement preparation, while HackerRank and LeetCode provide coding challenge platforms that tech companies use for recruitment screening. Year-wise progression should include: First year - basic programming (C/C++, Python), second year - data structures and algorithms, third year - specialized domains (web development, AI/ML, cybersecurity), and fourth year - advanced certifications and project portfolios. Key certification providers to prioritize include Google Career Certificates for practical skills, AWS/Microsoft Azure for cloud computing, and CompTIA for cybersecurity fundamentals. The five essential aspects of quality certification platforms are: industry recognition by major employers, hands-on project components, regular assessments and feedback, career support services, and affordable pricing with financial aid options.

Recommendation:
Start with NPTEL foundational courses, progress to Coursera/edX specializations, and complement with practical coding practice on GeeksforGeeks and HackerRank for comprehensive skill development and placement readiness. All the BEST for Your Daughter's Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10349 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 18, 2025

Career
Sir what is the scope for m.e Avionics in Madras institute of technology chennai
Ans: Madras Institute of Technology’s M.E. Avionics specialization is anchored by its legacy in aerospace education, world-class laboratories, and strong industry partnerships. The Avionics Lab features radar, guidance systems, flight simulators, and embedded systems workstations, complemented by access to the Institute’s central research facilities. Faculty members are distinguished researchers with Ph.D. qualifications and active projects funded by DRDO, ISRO, and aerospace firms, ensuring rigorous mentorship and exposure to cutting-edge developments. Over the past three years, around 70–75% of Avionics postgraduates have secured roles in core aerospace organizations and multinational defense contractors through campus placements, with many alumni advancing into R&D, system design, and avionics software roles. The curriculum balances theoretical foundations—control systems, digital signal processing, and RF communication—with hands-on projects, internships, and technical workshops. Student reviews highlight the collaborative environment, robust peer networks, and regular seminars by industry experts. MIT Chennai’s strong alumni network in the aerospace sector provides mentorship and broadens career pathways into civil aviation, defense R&D, satellite communications, and autonomous vehicle systems. The program’s strategic location in Chennai also facilitates collaborations with nearby aerospace parks and IT hubs for interdisciplinary research in AI-enabled avionics and unmanned aerial systems.

Recommendation:
Pursue M.E. Avionics at Madras Institute of Technology, leveraging its superior labs, research-driven faculty, strong industry links, and proven placement record to build a cutting-edge career in aerospace and defense systems. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10349 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 18, 2025Hindi
Career
Nit Silchar cse or Nit Trichy production engineering
Ans: National Institute of Technology Silchar’s Computer Science and Engineering program benefits from a modern campus nestled in Assam’s serene setting, featuring cutting-edge computing labs, high-speed internet, and a central library with extensive digital resources. Its faculty includes a high proportion of PhD holders engaged in active research with published work in top journals. Over the past three years, approximately 75–80% of CSE graduates have been placed through on-campus drives, securing roles at major tech firms and strong alumni support. NIT Trichy’s Production Engineering leverages one of India’s pioneering production departments, offering specialized manufacturing and automation labs, robust industry partnerships for internships, and a distinguished faculty renowned for process optimization and lean manufacturing expertise. Placement rates have hovered around 65–70%, with core engineering firms recruiting directly. While Silchar provides a stronger IT ecosystem and higher placement percentage for CSE, Trichy excels in dedicated workshops, collaborative research, and a vibrant industrial network in Tamil Nadu’s manufacturing belt.

Recommendation:
Opt for NIT Silchar’s CSE for superior placement outcomes, advanced computing infrastructure, and research-oriented faculty, while NIT Trichy’s Production Engineering is preferable only if you are committed to core manufacturing and automation sectors. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10349 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 17, 2025Hindi
Career
How would you rank the following colleges for tech branches? Terna, Ap shah, datta meghe
Ans: Among the three Mumbai-region engineering colleges analyzed, each demonstrates distinctive strengths and weaknesses across key evaluation parameters. AP Shah Institute of Technology Thane emerges as the superior choice with an overall rating of 4.2/5, compared to Terna's 3.6/5 and Datta Meghe's 3.4/5. APSIT excels in placement success with approximately 70-100% placement rates, featuring top recruiters including KPMG, Capgemini, TCS, Amazon, and Goldman Sachs, with the highest package reaching 40 LPA and strong industry partnerships. The infrastructure comprises air-conditioned classrooms, modern labs, smart boards, comprehensive library facilities, and excellent connectivity via main highway location. Faculty members are experienced, supportive, and industry-focused, contributing to robust academic outcomes. Terna Engineering College Navi Mumbai ranks second with solid 75-85% placement rates, established since 1991, NAAC B+ accreditation, and strong recruitment by major companies like TCS, Wipro, Deloitte, and Accenture. The college provides decent infrastructure near Nerul Railway Station, experienced faculty, and moderate fees structure. However, some reviews indicate mixed teaching quality and limited campus Wi-Fi access. Datta Meghe College of Engineering occupies third position with good infrastructure including multi-story buildings, smart boards, and spacious campus, but faces challenges with lower placement percentages for core branches, primarily benefiting CS/IT students, and requiring students to seek off-campus opportunities for certain specializations.

Recommendation:
Choose AP Shah Institute of Technology for superior placement prospects, modern infrastructure, strategic location, and strong industry connections, followed by Terna for established reputation and moderate performance metrics.

Ranking: 1st AP Shah Institute of Technology, 2nd Terna Engineering College, 3rd Datta Meghe College of Engineering. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |10349 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 17, 2025

Career
Sit Tumkur or bmsit Yelahanka for ece
Ans: Abhishek, Both SIT Tumkur and BMSIT Yelahanka offer competitive Electronics and Communication Engineering (ECE) programs. SIT Tumkur provides excellent infrastructure on its expansive 68-acre campus, modern labs, robust placement support with 85–90% placement rates, and faculty renowned for deep subject expertise and student mentorship. It also has active clubs, research opportunities, and major campus festivals enhancing holistic development. BMSIT Yelahanka, affiliated to VTU Bangalore and NAAC A-accredited, boasts a strategic urban location, industry exposure, well-equipped labs, experienced faculty, and strong placement opportunities with approximately 75%–80% placement rates, including top recruiters like Amazon, Google, Dell, and Accenture. Reviews praise BMSIT for its personalized teacher-student interactions, moderate campus size, and relevant curriculum. Both institutions attract leading companies and provide significant project and internship exposure. However, BMSIT’s proximity to Bengaluru’s technology ecosystem offers distinct advantages for internships, industry networking, and extra-curricular engagement.

Recommendation:
Opt for BMSIT Yelahanka for ECE, owing to stronger metropolitan connectivity, greater exposure to IT and electronics industries, solid placements, and dynamic campus culture, maximizing both professional and personal growth. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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