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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10870 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 17, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Asked by Anonymous - May 16, 2024Hindi
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I am 27 years old and recently married and have around 40lakhs savings please let me know very effective ways to invest them with relatively less risk and good yields for myself,my future kids and aging parents.

Ans: Strategizing Your Investment Approach for Multiple Goals
Understanding Your Financial Landscape
At 27, with 40 lakhs in savings and new familial responsibilities, it's crucial to adopt a prudent investment strategy that balances risk, returns, and long-term financial goals.

Step 1: Emergency Fund
Allocate a portion of your savings towards building an emergency fund equivalent to 6-12 months of living expenses. This fund acts as a safety net for unexpected expenses or income disruptions.

Step 2: Goal-Based Investing
Identify and prioritize your financial goals, including retirement, children's education, and supporting aging parents. Allocate your savings accordingly, considering the time horizon and risk tolerance for each goal.

Step 3: Diversified Portfolio
Construct a diversified investment portfolio comprising a mix of asset classes such as equities, debt, and alternative investments. Diversification helps mitigate risk and enhance long-term returns.

Step 4: Retirement Planning
Start investing in retirement-focused instruments such as Employee Provident Fund (EPF), Public Provident Fund (PPF), and Voluntary Provident Fund (VPF) to build a robust retirement corpus. Consider equity-oriented mutual funds for long-term growth potential.

Step 5: Children's Education
Open a dedicated investment account for your children's education and invest in equity-oriented mutual funds or education-specific investment options like Sukanya Samriddhi Yojana (SSY) or Children's Mutual Funds.

Step 6: Supporting Aging Parents
Ensure adequate provisions for your aging parents' financial well-being by investing in low-risk, income-generating assets such as fixed deposits, senior citizen savings scheme, or debt mutual funds.

Step 7: Regular Review and Adjustment
Periodically review your investment portfolio to track progress towards your goals and make necessary adjustments based on changing life circumstances, market conditions, and financial goals.

Step 8: Seeking Professional Guidance
Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) to create a comprehensive financial plan tailored to your specific needs and goals. A CFP can provide personalized advice, recommend suitable investment options, and help you navigate complex financial decisions.

Conclusion
By adopting a holistic approach to investment planning, you can effectively deploy your 40 lakhs savings towards achieving multiple financial goals while minimizing risk and maximizing returns. With careful planning, regular review, and professional guidance, you can secure a financially sound future for yourself, your family, and your aging parents.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10870 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 06, 2024Hindi
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Money
I am a 38 year old working woman with a toddler and aged mom to look after. Current income is around 15lac per annum and m living in metro city. Currently I have around 10lac as savings. I want to invest the same for the future of my kid and myself.I have started SSY child, PPF and NPS too. plz suggest good way of investing the above said amount.
Ans: Given your current situation and financial goals, here's a suggested approach to investing your savings:

Emergency Fund: Ensure you have a sufficient emergency fund equivalent to at least 6-12 months of your expenses. This fund should be easily accessible in case of unexpected expenses or emergencies.

Child's Future: Continue contributing to the Sukanya Samriddhi Yojana (SSY) for your child's future education and other needs. Additionally, consider investing in other child-specific investment options like education savings plans or mutual funds.

Retirement Planning: Continue contributing to the Public Provident Fund (PPF) and National Pension System (NPS) for your retirement. Both provide tax benefits and long-term savings opportunities. Ensure you are allocating appropriate amounts to these accounts based on your retirement goals and risk tolerance.

Wealth Creation: With the remaining savings, consider investing in a diversified portfolio of mutual funds. Allocate funds across various categories like large-cap, mid-cap, small-cap, and balanced funds based on your risk tolerance and investment horizon. Regularly review and adjust your portfolio as needed to stay aligned with your financial goals.

Insurance: Ensure you have adequate life and health insurance coverage for yourself and your family members to provide financial security in case of unforeseen circumstances.

Estate Planning: Consider consulting with a financial advisor or estate planner to create a comprehensive estate plan that addresses your specific needs and ensures the smooth transfer of assets to your beneficiaries.

Remember to regularly review your financial plan and make adjustments as needed based on changes in your life circumstances, financial goals, and market conditions. It's also advisable to seek professional financial advice to optimize your investment strategy and achieve your long-term financial objectives.

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10870 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 24, 2024

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Iam 38 and have 20 lakhs as my savings which I want to invest for 1,3,5 and 7 years. Please suggest appropriate as I'm willing to take risk but want good returns.
Ans: Investing with specific time horizons in mind is a smart approach. Here's a suggested investment strategy considering your willingness to take risks and aiming for good returns:

1-Year Investment (Short-term):
Liquid Funds: These funds offer stability and liquidity. They invest in short-term money market instruments. Given your short time horizon, liquid funds would be suitable as they offer better returns than savings accounts and are low-risk.
3-Year Investment (Medium-term):
Short-term Debt Funds or Ultra Short-term Funds: These funds invest in fixed-income securities with a maturity period of 1-3 years. They offer relatively higher returns than liquid funds and are less volatile than equity funds, making them a suitable choice for a 3-year horizon.
5-Year Investment (Medium to Long-term):
Balanced Funds or Hybrid Funds: These funds invest in a mix of equity and debt instruments. They offer potential for higher returns compared to debt funds while providing some cushion against market volatility. This combination could be ideal for a 5-year horizon.
7-Year Investment (Long-term):
Equity Mutual Funds: Given your willingness to take risks and the longer time horizon, equity funds would be appropriate.
Large Cap Funds: These funds invest predominantly in large-cap companies which are relatively stable and offer moderate returns.
Mid & Small Cap Funds: These funds invest in mid and small-cap companies which have the potential to offer higher returns but come with higher volatility.
Multi-Cap Funds: These funds provide diversification across market caps and offer flexibility to capitalize on market opportunities.
General Tips:

Diversification: Spread your investments across different asset classes and fund categories to reduce risk.
Regular Review: Periodically review your investments to ensure they align with your financial goals and adjust as necessary.
Risk Tolerance: While you're willing to take risks, ensure your investments align with your risk tolerance. Remember, higher returns come with higher volatility.
Lastly, it's advisable to consult with a Certified Financial Planner to tailor this strategy according to your specific financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance. They can provide personalized advice and help you navigate the complexities of investing.

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10870 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 04, 2024

Money
I am 24 years old and my current savings is rs 5000/- What suitable ideas do you have for long term that can give you good returns and can also potentially help you for future
Ans: As a Certified Financial Planner, I commend you on your foresight in seeking to secure your financial future. At 24, you have the advantage of time on your side. This allows you to leverage the power of compounding to grow your wealth. With an initial savings of Rs 5000/-, you can explore several long-term investment strategies that offer good returns and align with your future goals. Let’s dive into the various options available to you, keeping your specific circumstances and the Indian financial market in mind.

Understanding Your Financial Goals
Before diving into specific investment strategies, it's crucial to understand your financial goals. Are you saving for a house, a car, or your retirement? Defining your goals will help tailor your investment strategy accordingly.

Emergency Fund
First and foremost, it’s essential to have an emergency fund. This fund should cover 3 to 6 months of your living expenses. It acts as a safety net during unexpected situations like job loss or medical emergencies. You can park your emergency fund in a high-interest savings account or a liquid fund for easy accessibility and decent returns.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) in Mutual Funds
A Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) in mutual funds is a disciplined approach to investing. It allows you to invest a fixed amount regularly, irrespective of the market conditions. SIPs benefit from rupee cost averaging and compounding returns. Over time, these small investments grow significantly, providing substantial returns. Mutual funds offer diversification, reducing risk by spreading investments across various sectors and assets.

Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds are preferable over index funds for several reasons. These funds are managed by professional fund managers who actively make investment decisions to outperform the market. They have the flexibility to adjust the portfolio based on market conditions, which can lead to higher returns. Index funds, on the other hand, simply replicate the performance of a market index, offering limited scope for outperformance.

Equity Mutual Funds
Equity mutual funds invest in stocks and have the potential to deliver higher returns over the long term. They are suitable for young investors with a high risk tolerance and a long investment horizon. Equity funds come in various types, such as large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds. Diversifying your investments across these categories can provide a balanced risk-return profile.

Debt Mutual Funds
Debt mutual funds invest in fixed-income securities like government bonds, corporate bonds, and money market instruments. They offer more stability and lower risk compared to equity funds. Including debt funds in your portfolio can provide a stable income and act as a cushion against market volatility.

Diversified Portfolio
Creating a diversified portfolio is crucial for long-term wealth creation. Diversification involves spreading investments across various asset classes like equities, debt, and gold. This strategy helps in minimizing risk and maximizing returns. Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio to ensure it aligns with your financial goals and market conditions.

Retirement Planning
Starting retirement planning early gives you a significant advantage. Investing in the National Pension System (NPS) can be a prudent choice. NPS offers tax benefits, flexibility in investment options, and a steady income post-retirement. Additionally, consider investing in Public Provident Fund (PPF) for its safety, tax benefits, and decent returns.

Systematic Transfer Plan (STP)
A Systematic Transfer Plan (STP) allows you to transfer a fixed amount from one mutual fund to another. It’s an excellent strategy for gradually moving investments from a debt fund to an equity fund or vice versa. STPs help in mitigating risk by averaging the purchase cost and providing better returns.

Avoiding Investment Mistakes
It’s crucial to avoid common investment mistakes like chasing high returns, timing the market, and not diversifying enough. Stay focused on your long-term goals and maintain a disciplined investment approach. Regularly review your investments and make adjustments as needed.

Insurance Planning
Insurance is a critical component of financial planning. It’s essential to have adequate health and life insurance coverage to protect yourself and your family from unforeseen events. Avoid mixing insurance with investment. Policies like Unit Linked Insurance Plans (ULIPs) and investment-cum-insurance products often offer suboptimal returns and high charges. It’s better to surrender these policies and reinvest the amount in mutual funds for better growth.

Tax Planning
Effective tax planning can enhance your investment returns. Utilize tax-saving investment options like Equity Linked Savings Schemes (ELSS), PPF, and NPS. These instruments not only help in reducing your taxable income but also provide good returns over the long term.

Financial Discipline
Maintaining financial discipline is key to successful investing. Automate your investments through SIPs, avoid unnecessary expenses, and regularly save a portion of your income. Keeping track of your expenses and sticking to a budget can help you save more and invest consistently.

Continuous Learning
The financial market is dynamic, and staying informed is crucial. Continuously educate yourself about new investment options, market trends, and financial planning strategies. Reading financial blogs, attending webinars, and consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can provide valuable insights.

Starting Small
Starting with Rs 5000/- is a great step. As your income grows, gradually increase your investment amount. The key is to start early and invest consistently. Even small amounts can grow significantly over time through the power of compounding.

Review and Rebalance
Regularly reviewing and rebalancing your portfolio is essential. Market conditions and your financial goals may change over time. Adjust your portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your objectives and risk tolerance.

Benefits of Professional Guidance
Working with a Certified Financial Planner can provide you with personalized advice and help you navigate the complexities of investing. They can assist in creating a comprehensive financial plan, selecting suitable investment options, and achieving your financial goals.

Assessing Your Risk Tolerance
Understanding your risk tolerance is crucial in selecting appropriate investment options. Younger investors often have a higher risk tolerance due to their long investment horizon. However, it’s essential to balance high-risk investments with safer options to maintain stability.

Investing in Yourself
Investing in your skills and education can yield significant returns. Enhance your career prospects through continuous learning, certifications, and professional development. Higher earning potential translates to more savings and investments in the future.

Goal-Based Investing
Aligning your investments with specific goals can provide clarity and motivation. Create separate portfolios for different goals like buying a house, children's education, or retirement. This approach helps in tracking progress and staying committed to your financial objectives.

Benefit of Starting Early
Starting your investment journey early provides the advantage of time. Compounding works best over a long period, turning small investments into substantial wealth. The earlier you start, the more you benefit from compounding.

Flexibility and Liquidity
Choose investment options that offer flexibility and liquidity. While long-term investments are crucial, having access to funds during emergencies is equally important. Balance your portfolio with a mix of liquid and long-term assets.

Understanding Market Cycles
The market goes through cycles of ups and downs. Understanding these cycles can help you stay calm during market volatility. Avoid panic selling during market downturns and stay invested for the long term to reap the benefits of recovery.

Staying Updated with Regulatory Changes
Stay informed about regulatory changes that impact your investments. Changes in tax laws, interest rates, and investment regulations can affect your returns. Regularly consult with your Certified Financial Planner to stay updated and make necessary adjustments.

Avoiding High-Cost Investments
High-cost investment products can erode your returns. Be mindful of the fees and charges associated with investment options. Opt for low-cost mutual funds and avoid high-cost ULIPs and other investment-cum-insurance products.

Power of Compounding
The power of compounding is a fundamental principle of investing. It involves earning returns on your initial investment and the accumulated returns. The longer you stay invested, the more your money grows exponentially.

Inflation and Investment
Consider inflation while planning your investments. Inflation reduces the purchasing power of your money over time. Choose investment options that offer returns higher than the inflation rate to maintain your wealth’s real value.

Future Financial Security
Investing wisely today ensures financial security for the future. It provides the means to achieve your goals, enjoy a comfortable lifestyle, and handle emergencies with ease. Start early, stay disciplined, and make informed investment decisions.

Monitoring Your Investments
Regularly monitoring your investments is crucial. Keep track of the performance, review your portfolio, and make necessary adjustments. Staying informed and proactive ensures your investments stay on track to meet your goals.

Long-Term Perspective
Investing with a long-term perspective is essential. Short-term market fluctuations are common, but long-term investments typically yield better returns. Stay patient and avoid making impulsive decisions based on short-term market movements.

Diversification Across Sectors
Diversification is not just about asset classes but also sectors. Spread your investments across different industries to mitigate sector-specific risks. A well-diversified portfolio enhances stability and growth potential.

Understanding Mutual Fund Categories
Mutual funds come in various categories, each with different risk-return profiles. Understand the categories and choose funds that align with your financial goals and risk tolerance. This ensures a balanced and effective investment strategy.

Reinvesting Returns
Reinvesting the returns from your investments accelerates the growth of your wealth. Instead of withdrawing the returns, reinvest them to benefit from compounding. This strategy significantly boosts your long-term returns.

Setting Realistic Expectations
Set realistic expectations for your investment returns. High returns come with higher risks. It’s crucial to balance your return expectations with the associated risks to avoid disappointments and stay committed to your investment plan.

Financial Independence
Achieving financial independence is a significant milestone. It provides the freedom to pursue your passions, retire early, and enjoy a comfortable lifestyle. Consistent investing and disciplined financial planning are key to reaching this goal.

Conclusion
Investing wisely and consistently is the cornerstone of building a secure financial future. With an initial savings of Rs 5000/-, you have made a commendable start. By adopting a disciplined approach, diversifying your investments, and staying informed, you can achieve substantial growth and financial security. Remember, the journey to wealth creation is a marathon, not a sprint. Stay patient, stay focused, and your efforts will pay off in the long run.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10870 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 06, 2024Hindi
Money
I am 55 .my total savings value stands to 10lakh today include 4.5 lakh in ppf, 2 lakh in post office monthly income, around 20k in mutual fund ,i do 500 sip every month since last 2 yrs and have 5k in sbi mutual fund ( this amout is included in mutual fund) and and 2.5 fd and recurring.all these years could not save as could not meet expenses, am earning through teaching and have irregualr income as not teaching in school.where to invest particularly to make it 50 lakh in next years..is it possible..at the moment i can invest 25k monthly as earniing fairly good.dont know about future .no ancestral property or share
Ans: Current Financial Situation
You have accumulated Rs 10 lakh in savings. This includes Rs 4.5 lakh in a Public Provident Fund (PPF), Rs 2 lakh in a Post Office Monthly Income Scheme (POMIS), Rs 20,000 in mutual funds (including a Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) of Rs 500 per month for the past two years), Rs 5,000 in SBI Mutual Fund, and Rs 2.5 lakh in Fixed Deposits (FD) and recurring deposits. You are earning through teaching, which provides an irregular income. Currently, you can invest Rs 25,000 monthly. Let's explore how you can grow your savings to Rs 50 lakh in the next 10 years.

Investment Goals and Time Horizon
Setting clear financial goals is the first step towards achieving them. Your goal is to reach Rs 50 lakh in 10 years. This is a significant goal, but with disciplined investing and the right strategy, it is achievable. Given your current savings and potential to invest Rs 25,000 monthly, let's outline a plan.

Public Provident Fund (PPF)
The PPF is a safe, government-backed savings scheme with attractive tax benefits. Your existing Rs 4.5 lakh in PPF will continue to grow with compounding interest. It’s a long-term investment, ideal for retirement planning.

Since the PPF has a lock-in period of 15 years, it aligns well with your 10-year goal. The current interest rate on PPF is around 7.1% per annum. Regular contributions can be made up to Rs 1.5 lakh per year to maximize the benefit.

Post Office Monthly Income Scheme (POMIS)
POMIS is another safe investment, providing regular monthly income. However, the interest earned is relatively low compared to other investment options. Given your goal, you might want to consider redirecting the funds from POMIS to higher-yielding investments.

Mutual Funds
Mutual funds are excellent for wealth creation over the long term. With Rs 20,000 currently in mutual funds and Rs 500 SIP per month, you already have a start.

Considering your goal, increasing your SIP amount can significantly impact your corpus. Equity mutual funds, which invest in stocks, offer higher returns compared to debt funds but come with higher risk. However, for a 10-year horizon, equity funds are suitable due to their potential for higher returns.

Fixed Deposits and Recurring Deposits
FDs and recurring deposits provide guaranteed returns but at lower interest rates. Given the inflation rate, these may not be the best instruments for aggressive growth. You have Rs 2.5 lakh in FDs and recurring deposits, which can be partly shifted to higher-return investments.

Creating a Balanced Investment Portfolio
To reach your Rs 50 lakh goal, a balanced portfolio with a mix of equity and debt is essential. Here’s how you can allocate your investments:

Equity Mutual Funds
Equity mutual funds should form the core of your portfolio. Given the long-term horizon, you can take advantage of the higher returns from equity investments. Diversify across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds to spread the risk. Increasing your SIP amount from Rs 500 to Rs 25,000 monthly can significantly boost your corpus.

Debt Mutual Funds
Debt mutual funds provide stability to your portfolio. These funds invest in bonds and other fixed-income securities. They are less volatile than equity funds and offer moderate returns. A portion of your monthly investment can go into debt funds to balance the risk.

Hybrid Funds
Hybrid funds invest in both equity and debt, providing a balanced approach. They offer the growth potential of equities and the stability of debt. Allocating a part of your investment to hybrid funds can provide a good risk-return balance.

Systematic Transfer Plan (STP)
An STP allows you to transfer a fixed amount from a debt fund to an equity fund regularly. This strategy helps in averaging the purchase cost and managing market volatility. You can park a lump sum in a debt fund and systematically transfer it to an equity fund.

Evaluating Risks and Returns
Investing in mutual funds, especially equity funds, involves market risk. However, the risk is mitigated over a longer investment horizon. Historically, equity markets have delivered around 12-15% annual returns over the long term.

Debt funds offer lower returns (around 6-8%) but provide stability. The goal is to create a mix that aligns with your risk tolerance and return expectations.

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds involve professional fund managers making investment decisions. These managers aim to outperform the market indices by selecting high-performing stocks. Although they come with higher expense ratios, the potential for higher returns justifies the cost.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
SIP is a disciplined investment approach, allowing you to invest a fixed amount regularly. It averages out the cost of investment and reduces the impact of market volatility. Increasing your SIP amount to Rs 25,000 monthly can accelerate your journey towards the Rs 50 lakh goal.

Disadvantages of Index Funds
Index funds passively track market indices and aim to replicate their performance. While they have lower expense ratios, they cannot outperform the market. Actively managed funds, on the other hand, have the potential to generate higher returns through strategic stock selection.

Importance of Regular Funds
Investing through a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credential provides professional guidance. Regular funds involve a slightly higher expense ratio but offer personalized advice, portfolio review, and rebalancing services.

Monitoring and Reviewing Investments
Regular monitoring and reviewing of your investments are crucial. Market conditions, personal financial situations, and investment goals can change. A periodic review with a CFP ensures that your portfolio remains aligned with your goals.

Emergency Fund
While focusing on investments, it is essential to maintain an emergency fund. This fund should cover 6-12 months of your living expenses. It provides a financial cushion in case of unexpected events and prevents the need to dip into your long-term investments.

Tax Planning
Effective tax planning enhances your returns. Utilize tax-saving instruments under Section 80C, such as PPF and Equity-Linked Savings Scheme (ELSS) funds. ELSS funds have a lock-in period of three years and offer tax benefits along with equity exposure.

Retirement Planning
Given your age, retirement planning is crucial. The investments should cater to your retirement needs. PPF and EPF are excellent retirement planning tools. Supplement them with a diversified mutual fund portfolio to ensure a comfortable retirement.

Setting Realistic Expectations
Achieving Rs 50 lakh in 10 years requires disciplined investing and realistic expectations. While equity investments can offer high returns, they come with risks. Diversification across asset classes balances risk and maximizes returns.

Investing in Knowledge
Understanding financial markets and investment principles empowers you to make informed decisions. Attend financial literacy programs and stay updated with market trends. Knowledge is a powerful tool in achieving your financial goals.

Conclusion
Reaching your goal of Rs 50 lakh in 10 years is achievable with a strategic investment approach. Focus on a balanced portfolio with a mix of equity and debt. Increase your SIP contributions and leverage the benefits of actively managed funds. Regularly monitor and review your investments with the help of a Certified Financial Planner. Stay disciplined and informed to navigate the financial markets effectively.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

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Dear Sir, I did my BTech from a normal engineering college not very famous. The teaching was not great and hence i did not study well. I tried my best to learn coding including all the technologies like html,css,javascript,react js,dba,php because i wanted to be a web developer But nothing seem to enter my head except html and css. I don't understand a language which has more complexities. Is it because of my lack of experience or not devoting enough time. I am not sure. I did many courses online and tried to do diplomas also abroad which i passed somehow. I recently joined android development course because i like apps but the teaching was so fast that i could not memorize anything. There was no time to even take notes down. During the course i did assignments and understood the code because i have to pass but after the course is over i tend to forget everything. I attempted a lot of interviews. Some of them i even got but could not perform well so they let me go. Now due to the AI booming and job markets in a bad shape i am re-thinking whether to keep studying or whether its just time waste. Since 3 years i am doing labour type of jobs which does not yield anything to me for survival and to pay my expenses. I have the quest to learn everything but as soon as i sit in front of the computer i listen to music or read something else. What should i do to stay more focused? What should i do to make myself believe confident. Is there still scope of IT in todays world? Kindly advise.
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My married ex still texts me for comfort. Because of him, I am unable to move on. He makes me feel guilty by saying he got married out of family pressure. His dad is a cardiac patient and mom is being treated for cancer. He comforts me by saying he will get separated soon and we will get married because he only loves me. We have been in a relationship for 14 years and despite everything we tried, his parents refused to accept me, so he chose to get married to someone who understands our situation. I don't know when he will separate from his wife. She knows about us too but she comes from a traditional family. She also confirmed there is no physical intimacy between them. I trust him, but is it worth losing my youth for him? Honestly, I am worried and very confused.
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I understand how difficult it is to let go of a relationship you have built from scratch, but is it really how you want to continue? It really seems to be going nowhere. His parents are already in bad health and he married someone else for their happiness. Does it seem like he will be able to leave her? So many people’s happiness and lives depend on this one decision. I think it’s about time you and your BF have a clear conversation about the same. If he can’t give a proper timeline, please try to understand his situation. But also make sure he understands yours and maybe rethink this equation. It really isn’t healthy. You deserve a love you can have wholly, and not just in pieces, and in the shadows.

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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