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Roopashree

Roopashree Sharma  | Answer  |Ask -

Yoga, Naturopathy Expert - Answered on Feb 29, 2024

Roopashree Sharma, a qualified yoga trainer and naturopathy enthusiast, is the founder of Atharvanlife.
She has completed her diploma in naturopathic medicine/naturopathy from DY Patil University and her advanced diploma in yoga teacher training/yoga therapy from the university of Mumbai.... more
Sooriya Question by Sooriya on Feb 18, 2024Hindi
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My name is Sooriya, and I am writing to seek your guidance on a multifaceted set of goals I am committed to achieving in the coming years. I am currently 31 years old, standing at a height of 175 cm and weighing 89 kg. Over the past few years, I have actively engaged in a daily fitness routine, incorporating brisk walking and other exercises to address my weight management goals. Despite a successful reduction from 110 to 82 kg in the past, recent circumstances led to a weight gain, and I am determined to attain a weight of 70 kg or below. While personal constraints prevent me from joining a gym, I have dedicated an additional hour to my daily exercise routine. However, one of my challenges lies in frequent consumption of meals outside, even though I practice moderation. I would greatly appreciate any insights or recommendations you may have to help me effectively address this issue and achieve my weight loss objective. Additionally, I face the challenge of managing ADHD. Although I am currently on medication, progress has been limited. My goal is to overcome ADHD without medication, and any guidance or strategies you could provide in this regard would be invaluable. On the professional front, I am committed to excelling in my job, considering the responsibility of taking care of aging parents with a limited salary. I aim to become proficient in Carnatic music, having dedicated 20 years to the art and completed a diploma in first class. Simultaneously, I am learning German with the goal of clearing the A1 level. In the broader scope, my aspirations include becoming a pro in my job, achieving proficiency in German, excelling in Carnatic music concerts, and obtaining an additional PG degree. Furthermore, I am resolute in settling down, reducing my weight to 70 kg, and ensuring overall fitness by the age of 33. I acknowledge struggles with focus, procrastination, and a lack of proactiveness in my work, and I am actively seeking guidance to overcome these challenges. Your insights and recommendations would be highly valued as I embark on this journey towards personal and professional development. I appreciate your time and consideration.

Ans: It is good that you know yourself - both positives and your limitations. Everything is possible if you keep a balanced mind, along with your zeal - this way you can focus your energies in the right place. Therefore, to control the mind - meditation is key. I suggest you explore some of the Vipasana kendras near your residence. Be careful of misleading online videos and search for a good yoga/ vipasana teacher.
DISCLAIMER: The answer provided by rediffGURUS is for informational and general awareness purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional medical diagnosis or treatment.
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Roopashree

Roopashree Sharma  | Answer  |Ask -

Yoga, Naturopathy Expert - Answered on Mar 23, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 20, 2023Hindi
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Hi Gurus! I am 40 yr old MAN and I have never been regular at gym or exercising. I am 5 kg overweight as per my recent BMI and heart age of 52 yrs (not sure how reliable those results are but they definitely indicate something needs to be fixed) but no other serious health issues 🤞. However, I do perform some form of stretching, push-ups etc once in a couple of weeks which my physiotherapist advised as I had sciatica related pain in past. I do get back pain due to sedimentary lifestyle. Basically, I have not been taking my body and fitness seriously so far in my life. Now, I want to consciously start working out and get more active (my 40th B’day resolution 😊 ) and hence need your help with following (probably silly) situation: - I always wake-up hungry (~ 7:30 AM) and end up having a filling breakfast e.g 2 parathas or 5-6 cookies or 3-4 slices of toast & butter with mug full of chai with enough sugar and hence not able to exercise in the morning. Starting my day with red cross (❌) mark against a task (exercising) doesn’t set a good precedence either. In past I tried starting my day with glass of lukewarm water and lemon / honey etc but in just matter or 20-30 mins, I would feel extremely hungry, and I end up overeating, feeling more guilty ☹. Even after stuffing so much, I am again super hungry by ~13:00 ish for Lunch. TBH, I don’t see people around me eating so much ☹ -I cannot exercise in the evening as there is not fixed time when I would end my day. Also, I want to keep my evenings free for other imp things in my life 😉 Please guide how can I address my above issue so that either I don’t wake up hungry or I can eat something and still exercise. I googled my symptoms, and it says it’s a sign of PMS (?)
Ans: :) It looks like you have identified your problem, now the only thing left is to take steps in the right direction. If you are having dinner by 8PM or so, it is ok to feel hungry in the morning. It is good to take plain lukewarm water in the morning (3-4 glasses is also ok), you can eat if you feel hungry within half hour or so. To find the right time for exercise, start your day early by 06AM, so that you can have water and exercise by 07AM and still have your breakfast at 8AM.
Considering your current lifestyle, start with 15-20 mins of moderate walking, don't start with rigorous exercise as it may lead to muscle cramping. Ideally, you should go out for walking, but if you can't find time then find innovative ways like - spot walking, using your balcony or any free area near you. After a month you can gradually start with slow surya namaskar (if you havent practiced earlier, learn from a professional yoga practitioner and don't follow random online videos. Even 10-11 rounds are enough for the day, you can increase gradually as your stamina increases.
In your diet, replace cookies and biscuits with heathier options - get good quality home made, oats or whole wheat cookies, with jaggery, instead of white sugar and preservatives. Just to rule out any ailments, you can get a full body check-up including 2-3 Echo under prescription from a physician. Hope you can continue with your evening routine with your health routine...

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 11, 2025Hindi
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I am a 20 years old guy and in my past romantic relationships, have shown signs of emotional instability, too much dependency and lack of awareness of boundaries which affected my relationships badly...I hadn’t interacted with people in a long while since 2020 (precisely when lockdown had started) and feel that some aspects of my personality are not developed fully as they should be at this age. How to work on this? Also, i have noticed that I am able to create a good first impression but it soon pales and I feel like I am subtly disrespected or talked down to, and this has been happening in all interactions...i am always respectful (often to a fault!) and even have people pleasing tendencies...i sometimes ask immature weird questions and that might probably be the reason (but they’re never inappropriate)...but i do want to gain insights into why i am experiencing what i am and how to navigate this situation well so that I can maintain healthy relationships in future. Thanks you!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
First of all, I want you to understand that it is no small feat to realize the quirks and imperfections in ourselves- you have done it. Your effort to understand and rectify them deserves to be acknowledged and appreciated.
Now, coming to your question, I can only give you some general advice on each-
Emotional instability and dependency- these behavioral patterns can stem from various factors; it can be a lack of confidence or some past issues that are left unresolved. It is difficult for me to tell you exactly why it is happening. It can also arise from a lack of validation. To manage it, you can focus on self-regulation- like meditation or journaling whenever you feel these emotions rising. This way you are expressing them but not damaging your relationships. Take up new hobbies or goals. Achieving milestones can build confidence.
Navigating Boundaries- You can speak to your partner in the early stage of the relationship to understand their boundaries. This way there will be clarity and you won't overstep. You can set up some boundaries too.
For better interpersonal skills, you can proactively follow some rules- like active listening, avoiding overthinking, asking open-ended questions, and resisting the urge to seek your partner's approval.
About the awkward questions- it is important to understand that you might perceive them as awkward, but the person opposite to you might think of it as a genuine curiosity. As long as it isn't intrusive or inappropriate, there are no awkward questions.
Like these, I can only offer you some general advice. But the best advice of them all would be to seek counseling. It has done wonders for people. And the first step, which is identifying the issues is already done. Bravo! What's wrong with taking a little professional help in navigating the next steps? They can guide you in a more structured manner.
Hope this helps.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |499 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 09, 2025Hindi
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I’ve been in a relationship with a girl for the past 4 years, but due to various issues, things have become extremely complicated. Her father doesn’t approve of me, and my mother doesn’t like her either. Despite this, we’ve managed to stay together all these years. The problem is now escalating. My family is pressuring me to marry someone else, but I’m unable to leave her. At the same time, I feel I can’t marry her either because of her behavior and the ongoing issues with my family. I’ve tried to ask her to change certain things, but she hasn’t made any efforts in that direction. To make matters worse, her mother supports our relationship and trusts me, which makes it even harder for me to walk away. I don’t want her to marry someone else, but I also feel stuck because of my family’s expectations and the challenges in our relationship. Even If I leave her I don't know what she is going to do. What should I do in this situation to make the best decision for everyone involved?
Ans: it's crucial to reflect on what you truly want and need from a relationship. Ask yourself if this relationship brings you the happiness and fulfillment you seek, or if the challenges you face are too significant to overcome. It's important to differentiate between staying out of love and staying out of fear or obligation.

Talking to your partner openly is essential. Share your concerns honestly and listen to her perspective. If there are changes you've hoped for, express why they matter to you. At the same time, recognize that change is a two-way street—it requires effort and willingness from both sides. If she hasn't made efforts in the areas you've discussed, it may be worth considering whether this is a pattern that can be changed or a fundamental mismatch in expectations.

Your family's disapproval complicates things further, but it's important to remember that this is your life and relationship. While their opinions are significant, they shouldn't be the sole deciding factor in your happiness. Balancing respect for their wishes with your own needs is a delicate task, but ultimately, you need to make a decision that feels right for you.

If the relationship feels unsustainable despite your efforts, it may be time to consider a different path. It's understandable that you’re concerned about her well-being, especially given her mother's trust in you, but staying out of guilt or obligation can lead to further unhappiness for both of you. If you decide to part ways, doing so with kindness and honesty can help mitigate some of the hurt.

Ultimately, this decision is deeply personal. Weighing your feelings, the relationship dynamics, and your family's expectations will guide you toward a resolution that prioritizes your well-being and future happiness.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |499 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 20, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 09, 2025Hindi
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My age is 41 years. I have two kids. Nurturing n looking after them n whole home single handedly. I am a visiting faculty in a institute . Earns very nominal earning. My husband hits me, taunts me and use very arrogant words to me like tumhe belt se maarunga n similar many worst words. His family has been always unsupportive to me . Now after 16 years of marriage, he still wants me to please his mother n other family. Which I completely avoid as they have never supported me and always boycotted me. His real brother is in politics and all family members including his cousins do follow him and boycotted me n husband. Now for everything my husband blames me and says if you gave pleased them, all might have good. But inspite of pleasing them a lot , they are like treating me like I am a stranger. I handle n manage everything still by the end of the day.... everything is in vain. Husband says...What you did for home? I will never ever give my money to you and so on. I am literally in trouble thoughts, what to do ? I even many times thought to end my life but my kids are the reason I continuously bears everything. Please suggest what shall I do.
Ans: it's important to acknowledge that no one deserves to be treated with such disrespect and abuse. Your feelings of isolation and frustration are valid. It can feel overwhelming when the people who should support you instead make you feel like an outsider.

In situations like this, it’s crucial to find support outside the immediate family. Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or support groups who can offer you emotional strength and practical advice. Consider speaking with a counselor or therapist who can help you navigate these complex emotions and provide strategies for dealing with the abuse and stress.

You’ve shown immense resilience, especially for your children. They need you to be strong, and seeking help is a vital step in preserving your mental and emotional well-being. Remember, prioritizing your health is not selfish; it’s necessary for you and your children’s future.

Also, explore any legal avenues or resources available for individuals in abusive relationships. Local support organizations, legal aid, or women’s shelters can provide advice and assistance if you decide that leaving the relationship is the best option for your safety and well-being.

You have already shown great courage by managing so much on your own. Continue to seek out support and know that you are not alone in this journey. There are people and resources willing to help you find a path to a healthier and more secure life.

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