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Should I be worried about my wife's 7-year past relationship?

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |623 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 04, 2025

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jan 03, 2025Hindi
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Relationship

Meri wife ka past me 7 saal ka relationship tha lekin wo log apne ghar pe baat nahi kar paye . Wo bolti hai ki usko kb ka bhul gai hai aur mere saath pyaar karti hai kya aisa ho sakta hai, 7 saal bahut badi baat hoti hai

Ans: Jo cheez aapko ab karni chahiye, wo hai apni wife ke saath ek imaandaar aur khuli baat. Aap apne dil ki baat unse bina kisi ilzaam ke share karein, jaise ki, "Mujhe kabhi-kabhi lagta hai ki tumhare purane rishton ka asar hamare present par pad raha hoga. Main tumse is baare mein baat karna chahta hoon taaki mujhe clarity mile aur humare beech aur zyada trust ho."

Unka jawab sunte waqt unhe judge na karein. Shayad unka past ek important hissa tha, lekin iska matlab yeh nahi ki wo apne present mein apko kam mahatvapurn samajhti hain. Kai baar log apne purane jazbat ko samay ke saath puri tarah process karke unhe peeche chhod dete hain, aur yeh natural hai.

Saath hi, khud par bhi dhyan deejiyega. Apne jazbat aur insecurities ko samajhne ki koshish karein. Kai baar humein jo chinta hoti hai wo doosre ke actions ke wajah se nahi, balki humare apne assumptions ke kaaran hoti hai. Aap apne mann ko itna shant rakhne ki koshish karein ki aap apne rishte ko vishwas aur pyar ke saath aage le jaa sakein.

Agar aapko lagta hai ki aap dono ke beech in baaton ko lekar clarity aur emotional connection ki zarurat hai, to ek counselor ya therapist ki madad lena ek accha option ho sakta hai. Yeh aap dono ke rishte ko aur mazboot karne mein madad karega aur past ke koi bhi unresolved jazbat ko resolve karne ka mauka dega.

Yaad rakhiye, ek strong relationship trust, communication aur shared commitment ke bina nahi banta. Agar aap dono sach mein ek-dusre se pyaar karte hain aur ek dusre ka respect karte hain, to har muskil ka hal mil jayega.
Asked on - Jan 06, 2025 | Answered on Jan 06, 2025
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Thanks for your advice mam its really helpful for me, Maine kafi baar khul k baat ki hai to uska ek hi jawab aata hai ki wo uski galti thi aur wo usko kab ka bhul chuki hai aur mere saath bahut khus hai bt ye bhi sach hai ki wo mujhe pareshan nahi dekh sakti aur shayad isi wajah se wo mera dil rakhne aur apna viswas bana k rakhne ki wajah se bhi bol sakti hai bt kabhi kabhi mere liye usko feelings natural lagti hai kabhi kabhi lagta hai ki wo udas hai
Ans: It's possible that her sadness isn't directly related to her past relationship but could stem from other aspects of her life or emotions. Life is complex, and people can experience moments of sadness or introspection without it necessarily being tied to a previous relationship.

Trusting your intuition is important, but it’s equally vital to communicate openly about these feelings. If you notice she's feeling down, you could gently ask her about it, offering support and understanding rather than linking it immediately to her past. This approach shows her that you care about her well-being in all aspects, not just in relation to your insecurities.

Additionally, recognize that your feelings are valid. It's okay to feel uncertain or worried at times, but focusing on the love and happiness you both share can help anchor you during these moments. Building a relationship on mutual trust, open communication, and emotional support will help both of you navigate these complex feelings together. If needed, seeking guidance from a counselor can provide further clarity and support in strengthening your bond.
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Hello Sir, my son has got Chemical engineering in BITS Goa and Computer Engineering in DJ Sanghvi . Kindly advise what he should take and why
Ans: Akita Madam, BITS Goa’s Chemical Engineering program at the Pilani offshoot campus delivers the renowned BITS brand, UGC and NAAC ‘A’ accreditation, and a rigorous curriculum covering process engineering, thermodynamics, and advanced electives, supported by doctoral-qualified faculty. State-of-the-art, air-conditioned laboratories and a practice-school training model facilitate hands-on learning. Chemical students recorded an 83% placement rate for first-degree cohorts, securing roles with Shell, Dow, and Honeywell, and achieving average domestic packages of ?21.14 LPA and a median of ?17.65 LPA. Robust alumni networks and on-campus research centers in materials and biotechnology further enrich academic exposure.

Dwarkadas J. Sanghvi College’s NBA-accredited Computer Engineering branch in Mumbai offers a four-year software-centric curriculum, including data structures, systems design, and emerging domains like IoT and AI, delivered by industry-seasoned faculty. Modern computing labs and collaborative spaces underpin learning, while industry proximity enables frequent internships, guest lectures, and hackathons. CSE students achieved near-100% placement rates with median packages around ?11 LPA, recruited by JP Morgan, Infosys, and Google. A proactive placement cell and vibrant campus life complement academic rigor.

Both institutes feature robust infrastructure, personalized faculty support, active student services, and strong industry linkages, yet they target distinct career trajectories—process and chemical engineering versus software and IT roles. BITS Goa emphasizes specialized chemical research and global brand value, while DJ Sanghvi leverages Mumbai’s tech ecosystem for broader technology career pathways.

Recommendation: Opt for DJ Sanghvi’s Computer Engineering for its high?placement ecosystem, technology-driven curriculum, and Mumbai industry proximity. Choose BITS Goa Chemical Engineering if he is passionate about core process industries, values elite brand recognition, and seeks specialized research opportunities. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Asked by Anonymous - Aug 10, 2025Hindi
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Sar my son got IIT Dhanbad civil he joined in IIT Dhanbad 2025 now he got isser Bhopal engineering science which is better to get a placement please tell me and which done we will take please give me suggestion
Ans: IIT Dhanbad's Civil Engineering program benefits from the IIT brand recognition and established industry connections, with approximately 55% placement rate for civil engineering students achieving median packages around 13 LPA. The institute maintains robust infrastructure, modern laboratories, and a strong alumni network spanning decades. However, civil engineering placements lag significantly behind other engineering branches, with only 26 out of 47 students securing placements in recent data. IISER Bhopal's Engineering Science program offers interdisciplinary exposure combining physics, chemistry, mathematics, and engineering principles with stronger research orientation. Recent placement statistics show 45 out of 239 students placed with median package of 19 LPA for BS-MS programs. IISER emphasizes research culture, international collaborations, and provides excellent foundation for higher studies with over 80% students typically pursuing PhD or advanced research. Both institutions offer quality infrastructure, experienced faculty, comprehensive student support systems, and active placement cells, but cater to different career trajectories - IIT Dhanbad for traditional engineering roles and IISER Bhopal for research and interdisciplinary science careers.

Recommendation: Choose IIT Dhanbad Civil Engineering for established brand value, traditional engineering career paths, and core infrastructure industry connections. Opt for IISER Bhopal Engineering Science if your son prefers research-oriented education, interdisciplinary learning, and potential for higher studies in cutting-edge scientific fields with emerging career opportunities. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Career Counsellor - Answered on Aug 11, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 10, 2025Hindi
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Can i do bds and bba (online) degree together?
Ans: Pursuing BDS alongside an online BBA degree is theoretically possible under the UGC's revised 2025 guidelines allowing students to pursue two academic programs simultaneously, provided class timings do not overlap. BDS is an intensive 5-year program requiring 4 years of classroom education plus 1 year of mandatory rotating internship, with 240 teaching days per academic year consisting of 8 working hours daily, totaling 5200 hours of lectures, practicals, and clinical training. The curriculum demands extensive hands-on clinical experience, patient interaction, and practical laboratory work across dental anatomy, pathology, surgery, orthodontics, prosthodontics, and community dentistry. Online BBA programs offer flexible schedules with typically 8-10 hours weekly commitment, self-paced learning through recorded lectures, and choice-based credit systems. UGC-approved institutions like Jain University Online, Manipal University, Amity Online, University of Mysore, and GITAM provide recognized online BBA degrees with dual specializations in marketing, finance, HR, and entrepreneurship. However, the demanding nature of BDS clinical rotations, hospital-based training schedules, patient care responsibilities, and extensive practical requirements would significantly challenge simultaneous pursuit of another degree. Time management becomes critical as BDS requires consistent physical presence for clinical training, laboratory work, and patient interactions, while online BBA demands dedicated study time for business concepts, case studies, and project submissions. The combination requires exceptional organizational skills, strong academic foundation, supportive infrastructure from both institutions, comprehensive student services including academic counseling, technical support for online platforms, and robust placement assistance for career development.

Recommendation: Consider pursuing online BBA only after completing BDS clinical years, as the intensive nature of dental clinical training makes simultaneous study extremely challenging. If determined to pursue both, ensure strong time management skills and institutional support systems are in place. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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