Home > Money > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

Overwhelmed with debt and expenses: How can I manage my finances on a 45k monthly income?

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 16, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Nital Question by Nital on Jul 15, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money

Hii sir, my monthly income is 45k. My rent is 10k and my emi is 40k. Every month i spend money monthly on credit card. My loan is 300000. How should i manage

Ans: I appreciate your willingness to address your financial situation. Managing finances with a monthly income of Rs 45,000 and significant expenses can be challenging. Let’s break it down step-by-step.

First, your rent is Rs 10,000 and your EMI is Rs 40,000. This means your monthly fixed expenses are Rs 50,000, which is more than your income. Additionally, using a credit card for monthly expenses indicates a potential debt trap.

Identifying Key Financial Challenges

Your primary challenges are:

Income is less than expenses

High EMI compared to income

Dependency on credit cards for daily expenses

Addressing these issues requires a comprehensive approach.

Creating a Budget

A well-planned budget is crucial. List all your expenses, including rent, EMI, groceries, utilities, transportation, and credit card payments. This helps identify areas where you can cut costs.

Reducing Discretionary Spending

Review your discretionary expenses. These are non-essential costs like dining out, entertainment, and shopping. Reducing these expenses can free up some funds.

Prioritizing Debt Repayment

Your loan is Rs 3,00,000. High EMIs indicate a large debt burden. Prioritizing debt repayment is essential to regain financial stability.

Exploring Loan Restructuring Options

Talk to your bank about restructuring your loan. They may offer options like extending the loan tenure or reducing the EMI. This can help manage your cash flow better.

Increasing Your Income

Consider ways to increase your income. Look for part-time jobs, freelance work, or side businesses. Every extra rupee can help.

Building an Emergency Fund

An emergency fund is crucial. Start small. Save Rs 500 or Rs 1,000 monthly. This fund can cover unexpected expenses without relying on credit cards.

Using Credit Cards Wisely

Credit cards are convenient but can lead to high-interest debt. Aim to pay off your credit card balance in full every month. If that’s not possible, pay more than the minimum due to reduce interest charges.

Seeking Professional Financial Guidance

Engaging a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide personalized advice. They can help create a financial plan tailored to your situation. A CFP can assist with budgeting, debt management, and long-term financial planning.

Avoiding New Debt

Avoid taking on new debt. This includes personal loans, additional credit cards, or any form of credit. Focus on reducing existing debt first.

Negotiating Better Terms with Creditors

Talk to your creditors. Sometimes, they offer hardship programs that can lower interest rates or extend repayment periods. This can ease your financial burden.

Exploring Consolidation Loans

A consolidation loan can combine multiple debts into one loan with a lower interest rate. This simplifies repayment and can reduce monthly payments.

Monitoring Your Financial Progress

Regularly review your financial progress. Track your income, expenses, and debt repayment. Adjust your budget as needed to stay on track.

Building Good Financial Habits

Developing good financial habits is key. This includes:

Living within your means

Saving regularly

Avoiding impulse purchases

Being mindful of credit card use

Creating a Long-Term Financial Plan

A long-term financial plan is essential for financial security. This includes:

Setting financial goals

Creating a savings plan

Investing for the future

Disadvantages of Direct Funds

Investing in direct funds without guidance can be risky. Lack of professional advice can lead to poor investment choices.

Benefits of Regular Funds via CFPs

Investing through a CFP provides several benefits:

Professional advice

Personalized investment strategies

Regular portfolio reviews

CFPs can help align your investments with your financial goals.

Emphasizing Financial Discipline

Financial discipline is crucial. Stick to your budget, avoid unnecessary expenses, and prioritize debt repayment. This will improve your financial situation over time.

Recognizing the Importance of Financial Education

Financial education is vital. Learn about personal finance, budgeting, and investing. This knowledge empowers you to make informed financial decisions.

Final Insights

Managing finances with a limited income and high expenses is challenging but achievable. It requires a disciplined approach, prioritizing debt repayment, and seeking professional guidance.

Regularly review and adjust your financial plan to stay on track. Stay disciplined, avoid new debt, and work towards financial stability.

Remember, every small step counts towards achieving your financial goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
Money

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 10, 2024

Listen
Money
Hi sir, i am 30 year old, working in MNC with salary of 55,000. My monthly expenses includes 26,000 Home loan EMI and 10,000 household expenses. Also annually 53,000 Paying for life insurance payment. Please suggest me how should i manage by finance.
Ans: I understand managing finances can be a bit overwhelming. You are doing a great job balancing your home loan EMI, household expenses, and life insurance payment. Let's break down your financial situation and explore ways to optimize it for a better future.

Understanding Your Current Financial Situation
Your monthly salary is Rs 55,000, and you have several financial commitments.

Home loan EMI: Rs 26,000
Household expenses: Rs 10,000
Annual life insurance payment: Rs 53,000
This leaves you with Rs 19,000 each month. Your annual life insurance payment translates to roughly Rs 4,417 per month.

Assessing Your Financial Goals
At 30, you likely have various financial goals.

Building an emergency fund
Saving for future expenses, such as children's education or marriage
Planning for retirement
Enjoying life and achieving personal milestones
Let's break down how to achieve these goals step by step.

Building an Emergency Fund
An emergency fund is crucial. It should cover at least six months of your expenses.

Your monthly expenses total Rs 36,000 (EMI, household expenses, and life insurance).

Aim to save Rs 2,16,000 in your emergency fund.

Start by saving a portion of your Rs 19,000 surplus each month.

Optimizing Your Life Insurance
Review your life insurance policy.

Ensure it provides adequate coverage.

Consider whether it’s an investment cum insurance policy, like ULIPs or endowment plans.

These policies often have high costs and low returns.

If so, think about surrendering it and reinvesting in a more efficient mutual fund.

Exploring Mutual Funds
Mutual funds can be a powerful tool for wealth creation.

They offer diversification and professional management.

Let’s explore the types of mutual funds.

Types of Mutual Funds
Equity Funds: Invest in stocks, suitable for long-term goals. Higher returns but more risk.

Debt Funds: Invest in bonds, suitable for short-term goals. Lower returns but safer.

Hybrid Funds: Invest in both stocks and bonds. Balanced risk and return.

Advantages of Mutual Funds
Diversification: Reduces risk by investing in various assets.

Professional Management: Experts handle your investments.

Liquidity: Easily buy and sell mutual fund units.

Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs): Invest small amounts regularly, ensuring disciplined savings.

Power of Compounding
Investing in mutual funds harnesses the power of compounding.

Earnings from your investments generate more earnings.

The earlier you start, the more your money grows over time.

Balancing Risk and Return
Investing always involves some risk.

Understand your risk tolerance before investing.

Equity funds are riskier but can offer higher returns.

Debt funds are safer but with lower returns.

Hybrid funds offer a middle ground.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
SIPs are a disciplined way to invest in mutual funds.

You can start with a small amount.

It helps in averaging out the cost and reduces market volatility impact.

Reviewing Your Budget
Let's review your budget to free up more funds for investment.

Salary: Rs 55,000
Home loan EMI: Rs 26,000
Household expenses: Rs 10,000
Life insurance: Rs 4,417 (monthly equivalent)
This leaves Rs 14,583 each month.

Reducing Household Expenses
Consider reducing household expenses.

Small savings can add up.

Review your monthly spending and identify areas to cut back.

Increasing Income
Look for opportunities to increase your income.

Could be a part-time job, freelancing, or passive income sources.

Regular Financial Review
Regularly review your financial plan.

Make adjustments based on changes in your life circumstances.

Consulting a Certified Financial Planner
Consulting a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can be beneficial.

They can provide personalized advice and help you navigate complex financial decisions.

Final Insights
Balancing financial commitments and planning for the future can be challenging, but with a strategic approach, it's achievable.

Build an emergency fund, optimize your insurance, explore mutual funds, and review your budget regularly.

Your financial journey is unique, and making informed decisions will help you achieve your goals.

Stay disciplined, be patient, and consult a CFP for tailored advice.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 02, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 17, 2025Hindi
Money
Hi sir , i am 27 years old with multiple personal loan of 2L , 1.03L , 65k, 70k and some credit card bill EMIs of around 10k and EMI for those loan above including all i am paying around 25k EMI per month and my salary is 28k , my house expense is handled by my parents what should i do how to handle or mange the money in this situation.
Ans: You are 27 years old.

Your monthly salary is Rs 28,000.

Your parents manage the house expenses.

You have multiple personal loans and EMIs of Rs 25,000.

This leaves you only Rs 3,000 each month.

It is a serious concern and needs a focused plan.

Let’s appreciate that you are seeking help now.

It shows you care about your financial health.

Let’s create a step-by-step approach to handle this.

Assessing the Debt Situation
Your total loans add up to Rs 2 lakh, 1.03 lakh, 65k and 70k.

You also have credit card EMIs of Rs 10,000.

Your total EMIs are Rs 25,000 every month.

Your EMIs are almost 90% of your salary.

This is a heavy burden for your current income.

We need to find ways to reduce this.

We also need to ensure you don’t fall into bigger debts.

Let’s break down your debts one by one.

Let’s also see if you have any assets to sell.

If not, we will look at negotiation with lenders.

Step 1: Creating a List of Debts
Write down each loan with interest rate, tenure and EMI.

Note the credit card EMIs also.

Note down the total outstanding of each loan.

This will help you see which loan is costing you most.

Usually, credit cards have the highest interest rates.

Personal loans also have high rates.

It is important to know this to prioritise repayment.

Step 2: Prioritising Debt Repayment
First focus on clearing high-interest debts.

This is usually credit card EMIs.

They charge very high interest.

You should try to pay them off first.

If possible, use any bonus, gift or extra income to pay them.

This will save you money in interest payments.

If not possible, let’s move to the next step.

Step 3: Talking to Your Lenders
Contact your banks and lenders.

Explain your income and EMI burden.

Ask if they can restructure the loan.

They may offer lower EMIs or longer tenure.

This can reduce your monthly EMI burden.

This will give you some breathing space.

Also, ask them if they can reduce the interest rate.

Some lenders offer reduced rates for loyal customers.

Step 4: Exploring Consolidation of Loans
Debt consolidation is combining loans into one loan.

You take a new loan with lower interest to pay old loans.

This new loan has one EMI instead of many EMIs.

It will be easier to manage.

This reduces stress and confusion.

Look for lenders who give lower interest consolidation loans.

Make sure the new EMI is affordable for your income.

Do not take new loans from informal sources.

Only use trusted banks or NBFCs.

Step 5: Reviewing Your Spending
With only Rs 3,000 left each month, you need to be careful.

Track every rupee you spend.

Note down each expense daily.

Avoid unnecessary spending.

Save money on transport, eating out and other extras.

Find ways to save even small amounts.

Even small savings will help repay debts.

Step 6: Looking for Extra Income
Your parents manage house expenses.

So you can focus on earning extra income.

Look for part-time jobs or freelancing.

Many online platforms offer small income options.

Even Rs 2,000-3,000 extra can help pay debts faster.

Consider teaching or tutoring if you have skills.

Sell things you don’t use like old gadgets or furniture.

Every rupee earned will ease your EMI burden.

Step 7: Avoiding More Debts
Do not take new loans unless it is an emergency.

Using credit cards for daily expenses can create new debts.

Do not fall for offers like easy EMIs or cashback loans.

Your goal is to become debt-free first.

Once you pay off debts, you can think about other goals.

Step 8: Planning for an Emergency Fund
Once you reduce your debts, build an emergency fund.

This will protect you from new debts.

Start small with even Rs 500 or Rs 1,000 each month.

Keep this money separate from your spending account.

Over time, this fund will grow.

It will help in case of job loss or sudden expenses.

Step 9: Financial Discipline and Mindset
Managing money is not only about numbers.

It also needs a disciplined mindset.

Be patient with your progress.

Avoid comparing with others.

Stay motivated and consistent.

Celebrate small wins like paying off one loan.

These wins will encourage you to keep going.

Final Insights
Your situation is challenging but not hopeless.

With clear planning, you can manage your debts.

Start by listing your debts and understanding them.

Prioritise paying high-interest debts first.

Talk to lenders for restructuring if needed.

Avoid new debts and cut down on spending.

Look for extra income sources to boost your repayment.

Once debts are cleared, focus on saving and investing.

Avoid investing in direct mutual funds without a trusted MFD.

Regular funds via MFD have guidance and service.

Direct funds miss this personalised support.

This can hurt long-term wealth building.

As you clear debts, you will feel more confident.

You will also learn good money habits for life.

This effort will bring you financial peace.

Your parents will also feel proud of your efforts.

I am here to guide you step by step.

You will come out stronger from this situation.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 04, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 10, 2025Hindi
Money
Hi my monthly income is 2.8lakh and In that I personal loan of 11lakh outstanding and mortgage of 1cr both EMI comes around 1.8 lakh and mutual fund of 6lakh I want repay my load as soon as possible how to manage it i dont hv life insurance and health insurance also
Ans: You are taking a very responsible and mature step by thinking of repaying your loans faster. Managing Rs.1.8 lakh of EMIs from Rs.2.8 lakh income is not easy. But your intention and discipline will lead to a solution. You already have mutual funds worth Rs.6 lakh. That gives you a foundation to build on.

Let me help you with a full 360-degree guidance on managing loans, protection, and future growth.

» Understand the Current Financial Stress

– You earn Rs.2.8 lakh per month. That’s a strong income.

– Rs.1.8 lakh goes in EMIs. That’s 64% of income.

– This EMI share is very high and risky.

– You are left with Rs.1 lakh only for all expenses and savings.

– This is tight. One medical issue or job gap can disturb everything.

– No insurance adds more financial risk.

– So before repaying loans, protection must come first.

» First Priority – Buy Term Life Insurance

– If something happens to you, loans will remain for family.

– So term insurance is compulsory.

– Don’t delay this. Take it before doing anything else.

– Choose a cover of at least 15 to 20 times your yearly income.

– That is minimum Rs.80 lakhs to Rs.1 crore cover.

– It should be pure term insurance only.

– No endowment, no ULIP, no return policies.

– Premium is very low for term plans.

– Even Rs.800 to Rs.1200 per month can get good cover.

– It gives peace to your family and saves their future.

» Second Priority – Buy Health Insurance Now

– If hospitalisation happens, EMI will not help.

– Medical expenses can cross lakhs in a few days.

– You may use mutual funds or take more loan.

– That makes things worse.

– So take health insurance immediately.

– Get a Rs.5 lakh to Rs.10 lakh family floater policy.

– Premium will be affordable at your age.

– Health insurance protects savings and keeps cash flow safe.

» Personal Loan Should Be Cleared First

– Personal loan is usually costlier than home loan.

– It charges higher interest.

– It doesn’t give tax benefit.

– So repay personal loan faster than home loan.

– Focus all surplus income towards personal loan part first.

– Don’t rush to prepay home loan yet.

» Don’t Touch Mutual Fund Investments Now

– You have Rs.6 lakh in mutual funds.

– Don’t redeem these funds yet.

– They are your only growth assets for now.

– If you sell now, you break compounding.

– Instead, let them grow slowly.

– Use income surplus to reduce loans.

– Don’t use long-term funds for short-term problems.

» Create a Cash Flow Budget Immediately

– Write down monthly fixed costs like rent, groceries, transport.

– List all EMI commitments and essential expenses.

– See how much exact surplus remains.

– Target that full surplus for prepaying personal loan.

– Keep 5% buffer for emergencies.

– Be strict with unnecessary spends.

– Delay travel, gadgets, and lifestyle upgrades till loan is cleared.

» Try to Reduce EMI Through Restructuring

– If personal loan EMI is high, talk to lender.

– Ask for restructuring or tenure extension.

– It may reduce EMI and ease cash flow.

– If interest rate is very high, consider balance transfer.

– Only if the new loan has lower rate and cost.

– Don’t jump to another loan without full clarity.

» Don’t Take Fresh Loan or Credit Cards

– Avoid top-up loans, BNPL offers, or new credit cards.

– Focus only on closing what you already have.

– Even if pre-approved offers come, ignore them.

– Every new credit adds long-term burden.

» Emergency Fund is Must Before Aggressive Prepayment

– Even with high EMIs, keep Rs.1 lakh to Rs.1.5 lakh aside.

– That’s your emergency fund.

– You can keep it in savings account or liquid mutual fund.

– This helps in case of job loss or health issue.

– Don’t go to zero balance while repaying loans.

» SIP Can Be Paused Temporarily If Needed

– If mutual fund SIP is running now, you may pause it.

– Only if cash flow is too tight.

– This is temporary step, not permanent.

– Once personal loan is closed, restart SIPs.

– Don’t stop all investments unless situation forces it.

» Avoid Early Home Loan Closure Right Now

– Home loan gives tax benefits.

– Interest rates are usually lower.

– Don’t rush to prepay home loan now.

– Pay it after personal loan is over.

– For now, only make regular EMI payment for home loan.

» Avoid Index Funds If Part of MF Portfolio

– If your mutual funds are index-based, review them.

– Index funds copy the market.

– They fall fully when market falls.

– They don’t manage risk actively.

– In India, active fund managers still outperform.

– Actively managed funds protect better during volatility.

– Shift slowly from index funds to active funds through SIP.

» Take Help From Certified Financial Planner

– A CFP helps you set clear action plan.

– They guide you on loans, insurance, investments, and budgeting.

– They help rebalance mutual fund portfolio as well.

– You get regular tracking and review support.

– Investing through a CFP also gives behavioural support.

– You avoid panic selling or wrong decision during stress.

» After Personal Loan Closure, Increase SIP

– Once personal loan is cleared, cash flow will improve.

– Then restart or increase SIPs without delay.

– Divert EMI amount into long-term SIPs.

– Use SIPs to build retirement fund or child education goal.

– Let mutual funds work for long-term wealth.

» Health Cover for Parents If Dependents

– If you support parents, check if they need health cover.

– Their hospitalisation can affect your loan plan.

– Include this in your budgeting and protection plan.

– Separate your personal goals from dependent needs.

» Don’t Use Insurance Plans Like ULIP or Endowment

– If agents suggest investment-cum-insurance, avoid it.

– These mix goals and give poor returns.

– Keep insurance and investment separate.

– Only term plan for insurance.

– Only mutual fund for investment.

» Take Small Steps Every Month

– Focus on one goal at a time.

– First, buy insurance covers.

– Second, create Rs.1.5 lakh emergency fund.

– Third, divert extra income to personal loan.

– Then, restart SIP and rebalance investments.

– Then, plan long-term financial goals like retirement.

» Bonus or Variable Pay Can Be Used Wisely

– If you get annual bonus, don’t spend it all.

– Use part of bonus to reduce personal loan.

– Use some for creating emergency fund.

– If any remains, invest through mutual funds.

» Track Loan Repayment Progress

– Use an Excel sheet or app to track loan.

– Each prepayment lowers your EMI interest portion.

– Keep checking how many months are saved.

– This keeps you motivated.

» Don’t Compare with Others or Copy

– Everyone has different income, loan, lifestyle.

– Don’t copy colleagues or friends’ investments.

– Follow what suits your goals and cash flow.

– A Certified Financial Planner gives you customised path.

» Finally

– You have done well to accept your situation and seek improvement.

– Your income is strong. That gives hope.

– Loans can be cleared with strict action.

– Don’t rush, but stay focused.

– Insurance protection is more urgent than prepayment.

– Mutual funds should stay invested.

– Follow a clear monthly plan.

– In 2 to 3 years, you will feel light financially.

– Stay committed. Financial freedom is possible.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 08, 2025Hindi
Money
I am 30 yer old my Annual CTC is 3.50lk per month salary credit 25k , my personal loan and Card loan and emi is 65k and my personal expenses is 7k each month how to manage and Incrise Income for repayment of EMI and Loan closer and my Total loan Account is 17lk , who can help me for repayment of loan and Closer and how to manage ,
Ans: You are already thinking about solving your debt early.
That shows discipline and focus on financial stability.
Many people avoid facing debt problems.
You are showing maturity by addressing it now.

» Understanding Your Present Position
Your monthly income credited is Rs 25,000.
Your EMIs total Rs 65,000 each month.
Your personal expenses are Rs 7,000.
Your total loan amount is Rs 17 lakh.
Clearly, EMIs are higher than your income.
This means you are likely borrowing or rotating credit to pay EMIs.
That is not sustainable for long.

» Key Risks in Your Current Situation
– EMI higher than income will lead to more borrowing.
– Interest on personal loans and credit cards is very high.
– You may face late payment penalties if cash flow tightens.
– Credit score can drop, making future borrowing costlier.
– Stress levels can impact work performance and health.

» Immediate Actions to Control Cash Flow
– First, list every loan account with balance and interest rate.
– Prioritise clearing high-interest credit card debt first.
– Reduce all non-essential expenses immediately.
– Pause any luxury spending till loans are reduced.
– Avoid taking new loans for any reason.
– Stop using credit cards for purchases.
– Convert high-interest credit card dues into lower-interest personal loan or EMI plans.

» Creating a Loan Repayment Strategy
– Use the avalanche method: repay highest interest loans first.
– Keep paying minimum dues on other loans to avoid penalties.
– After one loan is cleared, redirect that EMI amount to the next loan.
– This speeds up repayment without increasing overall EMI outflow.
– Track your repayment progress monthly.
– Stay motivated by celebrating small repayment milestones.

» Income Enhancement Opportunities
– Take up part-time freelance or gig work in evenings or weekends.
– Consider monetising any skill like teaching, designing, or consulting.
– Offer services like tuition, photography, or online content creation.
– Explore overtime opportunities at your current job.
– Sell unused assets or gadgets to create lump sum for loan repayment.
– Learn high-demand skills online and use them for side income.

» Managing EMIs with Limited Income
– Contact banks to restructure your loans.
– Ask for longer tenure to reduce monthly EMI.
– This gives you short-term relief in cash flow.
– Once income increases, prepay loans to reduce interest.
– Avoid settlement of loans unless unavoidable, as it impacts credit score.

» Building a Support Network
– Family members may help with interest-free or low-interest loan.
– This can be used to close costlier debts first.
– Friends or relatives can co-sign for a lower-interest personal loan to consolidate debts.
– Ensure repayment commitment to maintain trust and relationships.

» Emotional and Lifestyle Adjustments
– Accept a simple lifestyle till loans are cleared.
– Stay disciplined about tracking every rupee spent.
– Avoid peer pressure to spend on entertainment or gadgets.
– Focus on building income and savings mindset.

» How to Prevent Future Debt Traps
– Keep EMI-to-income ratio below 30% in future.
– Build an emergency fund equal to 6 months of expenses.
– Use credit cards only for convenience, not borrowing.
– Save at least 20% of income before spending.

» Role of a Certified Financial Planner
– A Certified Financial Planner can assess your full debt profile.
– They can design a customised repayment and investment roadmap.
– They will guide you on restructuring loans at lower interest.
– They will help you build a future savings plan alongside debt repayment.
– They can also create a long-term wealth plan after debt freedom.

» Finally
You can get debt-free with consistent actions and income growth.
By cutting costs, increasing earnings, and prioritising high-cost loans, repayment will speed up.
After debt closure, shift focus to savings and wealth creation.
Your financial discipline today will create a secure tomorrow.
Keep faith, act fast, and track your progress regularly.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 11, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 11, 2025Hindi
Money
My monthly salary is 88000 thousand, personal loan EMI is 31500,I invest 24000 monthly,household expenses is 10000,child education almost 5000,rent 4500,left with only 10000 in hand,How can I manage,plz suggest
Ans: You are already doing something very positive.
You have fixed investments every month.
You have kept expenses under control.
This is a very good starting point.

» Understanding your cash flow
– Your salary is Rs. 88000 per month.
– Loan EMI is Rs. 31500.
– Monthly investments are Rs. 24000.
– Household expenses are Rs. 10000.
– Child education is Rs. 5000.
– Rent is Rs. 4500.
– This leaves you with Rs. 10000 in hand.

» Assessing your current challenges
– Loan EMI is taking a high share of income.
– Investments are also high compared to surplus cash.
– Your fixed expenses are reasonable.
– Surplus of Rs. 10000 is too low for emergencies.
– This creates risk if unexpected costs arise.

» Reviewing your loan repayment
– EMI is almost 36% of income.
– Ideal EMI share is under 30% of income.
– Try to prepay small parts when you get bonuses.
– Even small prepayments reduce loan term.
– Avoid taking any more personal loans.
– Avoid refinancing unless rate reduction is good.

» Emergency fund importance
– Surplus cash each month is low.
– Keep at least 6 months of expenses as emergency fund.
– This means around Rs. 1.5 lakh minimum.
– Keep this in a liquid option with quick access.
– Build this before increasing other investments.

» Balancing investments and cash flow
– You are investing Rs. 24000 every month.
– This is almost 27% of income.
– Investments are good but liquidity is low.
– For next few months, reduce monthly investment slightly.
– Use freed amount to build emergency fund.
– Once fund is ready, resume higher investments.

» Prioritising child education planning
– Education cost rises faster than inflation.
– You are spending Rs. 5000 now.
– For higher education, plan separately.
– Use a goal-based investment approach.
– Allocate to a mix of diversified equity and debt.
– Review progress every year.

» Optimising household expenses
– Your household expenses are already low.
– Still, review bills every quarter.
– Negotiate for better rates on utilities if possible.
– Avoid lifestyle inflation until loan is reduced.
– Avoid large purchases on EMI or credit card.

» Insurance protection review
– Check if you have enough life cover.
– Cover should be at least 10-12 times annual income.
– Take pure term insurance for low cost.
– Review health insurance coverage for whole family.
– Adequate insurance prevents breaking investments for emergencies.

» Investment strategy refinement
– Continue disciplined investing but with balance.
– Focus on goal-based planning, not random amounts.
– Prefer actively managed funds over index funds.
– Actively managed funds can beat inflation and offer better downside protection.
– They have experienced fund managers making decisions, unlike index funds which follow the market blindly.
– Index funds cannot avoid poor-performing stocks in the index.
– In volatile markets, this can hurt returns.
– With a Certified Financial Planner, you can choose the right active funds for each goal.

» Avoiding direct fund pitfalls
– Direct funds give lower expense ratio but no guidance.
– Many investors choose wrong funds and wrong exit timing.
– Wrong asset mix can harm long-term returns.
– A regular plan through a Mutual Fund Distributor with CFP guidance gives proper monitoring.
– This helps in rebalancing and course correction.
– Professional tracking prevents emotional investment decisions.

» Tax planning alignment
– Review investments for tax efficiency.
– Use eligible options under Section 80C only after basic goals are funded.
– Avoid locking too much in long-term tax products without liquidity.
– Keep capital gains tax rules in mind for mutual funds.
– Plan redemption in a way to reduce tax impact.

» Building surplus gradually
– Current surplus is Rs. 10000 per month.
– After reducing investment slightly, you can raise surplus to Rs. 15000-18000.
– This will help in building emergency fund faster.
– Once fund is ready, channel extra into goal investments.
– Surplus also gives peace of mind during unexpected expenses.

» Psychological advantage of balance
– Too high investments with low liquidity cause stress.
– Balanced approach builds both future wealth and present safety.
– You can handle emergencies without breaking long-term plans.
– This improves your confidence in financial planning.

» Monitoring progress
– Review your financial plan every six months.
– Check if EMI share is going down.
– Check if emergency fund is growing.
– Track if investments are aligned to goals.
– Make small adjustments instead of large changes.

» Planning for loan closure
– Once loan is closed, you will free Rs. 31500 monthly.
– Allocate half to investments for faster wealth building.
– Keep the other half to increase lifestyle and savings.
– This will give a big positive boost to cash flow.

» Avoiding common mistakes
– Do not stop investments completely for long periods.
– Do not take new loans for discretionary spending.
– Avoid investing in unregulated products.
– Avoid mixing insurance and investment in same product.

» Building long-term wealth
– Wealth comes from discipline over decades.
– A steady plan with flexibility works best.
– Your current savings habit is strong.
– Add liquidity and goal clarity for full effectiveness.

» Finally
– You have a strong start with high savings habit.
– Adjust investment amount temporarily to build emergency fund.
– Focus on reducing loan burden over time.
– Keep child education and retirement as separate, clear goals.
– Use actively managed funds with CFP guidance for long-term growth.
– Review and adjust every six months to stay on track.
– This approach will improve cash flow now and wealth later.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 10, 2025Hindi
Money
I am 47 years old. I have started investing in mutual fund (SIP) only since last one year due to some financial obligations. Currently I am investing Rs.33K per month in various SIPS. The details are: Kotak Mahindra Market Growth (Rs. 1500), Aditya BSL Low Duration Growth (Rs. 1400), HDFC Mid-cap Growth (Rs. 12000), Nippon India Large Cap Growth (Rs. 3000), Bandhan small cap (Rs. 5000), Motilal Oswal Flexicap Growth (Rs. 5000), ICICI Pru Flexicap growth (Rs. 5000). I have also started to invest Rs. 1,50,000 per year in PPF since last year. Can I sustain if I retire by the age of 62?
Ans: I can help you with your retirement planning.
You have given a very detailed picture of your investments.
You have also shown strong intent to build wealth at 47.
This itself is a big positive start.

Your Current Efforts

– You started late due to obligations.
– That is understandable.
– You still took charge.
– You now invest Rs.33K every month.
– You also invest Rs.1,50,000 a year in PPF.
– You follow discipline.
– You follow consistency.
– These habits matter the most.
– These habits will help your retirement.
– You deserve appreciation for this foundation.

» Your Current Investment Mix

– You invest in various equity funds.
– You also invest in one low duration debt fund.
– You invest across mid cap, large cap, flexi cap, and small cap.
– This gives you some spread.
– You also invest in PPF.
– PPF gives safety.
– PPF gives steady growth.
– This mix creates balance.

– Please note one point.
– You hold direct plans.
– Direct plans look cheaper outside.
– But they are not always helpful for long-term investors.
– Many investors pick wrong funds.
– Many investors track markets wrongly.
– Many investors redeem at wrong times.
– This affects returns more than the saved expense ratio.
– Regular plans through a MFD with CFP support give guidance.
– Regular plans also help you stay on track.
– Behaviour gap is a major cost in direct funds.
– Thus regular plans with CFP support work better for long-term investors.
– They can correct mistakes.
– They can help with asset mix.
– They can help you stay steady during market drops.
– This gives higher final wealth than direct funds in most cases.

» Your Retirement Age Goal

– You plan to retire at 62.
– You are 47 now.
– You have 15 years left.
– Fifteen years is still a strong time line.
– You can allow compounding to work well.
– Your corpus can grow meaningfully by 62.
– You can also improve your savings rate during this time.

» Assessing If Your Current Plan Supports Retirement

– There are many parts to assess.
– You need to look at your saving rate.
– You need to look at your growth rate.
– You need to look at your future lifestyle cost.
– You need to look at inflation.
– You need to look at post-retirement income need.
– You need to see if your present plan matches this.

– Right now, your total yearly investment is:
– Rs.33K per month in SIP.
– That is Rs.3,96,000 per year.
– Plus Rs.1,50,000 in PPF each year.
– So your total yearly investment is Rs.5,46,000.
– This is a good number.
– This can help your retirement journey.

» Understanding Equity Funds in Your Mix

– You invest in mid cap.
– Mid cap can give good growth.
– Mid cap also carries higher swings.
– You invest in small cap.
– Small cap is the most volatile.
– It can give high returns if held for long.
– But it needs patience.
– You invest in large cap exposure.
– Large cap gives stability.
– You invest in flexi cap.
– Flexi cap funds adjust strategy.
– Flexi cap funds give managers more control.
– Active management is useful in Indian markets.
– Fund managers can shift between market caps.
– They can pick good sectors.
– This improves return potential.
– This is a benefit that index funds do not have.
– Index funds just copy the index.
– Index funds do not avoid weak companies.
– Index funds cannot take smart calls.
– Index funds also rise in cost whenever the index churns.
– Active funds can protect downside.
– Active funds can find better opportunities.
– This is helpful for long-term wealth building.
– So your move towards active funds is fine.

» Understanding PPF in Your Mix

– Your PPF adds stability.
– It gives assured growth.
– It also gives tax benefits.
– It builds a stable part of your retirement base.
– It reduces overall risk in your portfolio.
– It works well over long years.
– You have also chosen a steady long-term asset.
– This is beneficial for retirement.

» Gaps That Need Attention

– Your funds are scattered.
– You hold too many schemes.
– Each additional scheme overlaps with others.
– This reduces impact.
– It also becomes hard to track.
– You can reduce your scheme count.
– A more focused mix can give smoother progress.
– Rebalancing becomes easier.
– You can keep fewer funds but maintain asset spread.
– You can also map each fund to a purpose.

– You also need clarity about your retirement income need.
– Many investors skip this.
– You must know how much money you need per month at 62.
– You must add inflation.
– You must add health needs.
– You must also add lifestyle goals.

» Your Future Lifestyle Cost

– Your cost will rise with inflation.
– Inflation affects food, transport, medical needs.
– Medical inflation is higher than normal inflation.
– Retirement planning must consider this.
– You also need to consider family responsibilities.
– You must consider emergencies.
– You must also consider rising cost of daily life.
– This helps estimate the required retirement corpus.

» Your Future Corpus From Current Savings

– Without giving strict numbers, you can expect growth.
– You invest steadily.
– You invest for 15 years.
– Your equity portion can grow better over long time.
– Your PPF gives predictable growth.
– Your mix can create a decent retirement base.
– But you will need to increase your SIP over time.
– You can raise your SIP by 5% to 10% each year.
– Even small increases help.
– This builds a stronger corpus.
– Your final retirement amount becomes much higher.

» Need for Periodic Review

– Markets change.
– Life situations change.
– Your goals may shift.
– Your income may rise.
– Your responsibilities may change.
– Review every year.
– Adjust as needed.
– A Certified Financial Planner can help.
– This gives clarity.
– This gives structure.
– This gives confidence.
– You can reduce mistakes.
– You can follow proper asset allocation.

» Asset Allocation Approach for Smooth Growth

– You must decide your ideal equity percentage.
– You must decide your ideal debt percentage.
– If you take too much equity, risk increases.
– If you take too little equity, growth reduces.
– You must keep balance.
– It must match your risk comfort.
– It must support your retirement goal.
– Right allocation brings discipline.
– Rebalancing once a year helps.
– Rebalancing controls emotion.
– Rebalancing increases long-term returns.
– Rebalancing keeps your portfolio healthy.

» Importance of Staying Invested During Market Swings

– Markets move up and down.
– Swings are normal.
– Equity grows over long time.
– Equity needs patience.
– People often fear drops.
– They exit at wrong time.
– This hurts long-term wealth.
– You must stay steady.
– You must trust your long-term plan.
– You must follow guidance.
– This improves retirement success.

» Avoiding Common Mistakes

– Many investors pick funds based on recent returns.
– This is risky.
– Fund selection needs deeper view.
– Fund must match your risk.
– Fund must match your time horizon.
– Fund must have consistent process.
– Fund must show reliable pattern.
– Avoid sudden changes.
– Avoid chasing trends.
– Stay with a disciplined plan.
– This ensures better results.

– You must avoid mixing too many categories.
– Focused mix works better.
– Smaller set makes control easy.
– This reduces confusion.

– Do not rely on direct funds for long-term goals.
– Direct funds lack guided support.
– Behavioral mistakes cost more than the lower expense ratio.
– Regular plans help you stay invested.
– They help avoid panic.
– They help during reviews.
– They help create proper asset allocation.
– They help you use the fund in the right way.
– Investment discipline is more important than low cost.
– Regular plans with CFP support deliver this discipline.

» Inflation Protection Through Growth Assets

– Equity protects from inflation.
– PPF adds safety.
– Balanced mix protects your purchasing power.
– Retirement needs this balance.
– Long-term equity portion helps create a healthy corpus.
– This allows you to meet rising living cost.

» How to Strengthen Your Retirement Plan From Now

– Increase SIP every year.
– Even slight hikes help.
– Be consistent.
– Avoid stopping during market drops.
– Do a yearly check-up.
– Reduce scheme count.
– Keep a clear structure.
– Assign each fund a purpose.
– Build an emergency fund.
– This will protect your SIP flow.
– Continue PPF.
– It gives stability.
– It protects your long-term needs.

» Possibility of Sustaining Life After Retirement

– Yes, you can sustain.
– But it depends on three things:
– Your future living cost.
– Your total corpus at retirement.
– Your discipline during retirement.

– If you continue your present saving, your base will grow.
– If you raise your SIP each year, your base will grow faster.
– If you keep a proper asset mix, your base will grow safely.
– If you avoid emotional mistakes, your base will stay strong.
– If you review yearly, your plan will stay on track.

– So sustaining life after retirement is possible.
– You just need stronger structure.
– You also need steady guidance.
– This ensures confidence.

» Retirement Income Planning After Age 62

– Your retirement income must come from a mix.
– Part from equity.
– Part from debt.
– Part from stable instruments.
– Do not depend on one source.
– Plan your withdrawal pattern.
– Take small and stable withdrawals.
– Keep some equity even after retirement.
– This helps your corpus last longer.
– Do not shift everything to debt at retirement.
– That reduces growth too much.
– Balanced approach keeps your money alive.
– This supports your life for long years.

» Health and Emergency Preparedness

– Health costs rise fast.
– You must plan for it.
– Keep health insurance active.
– Keep top-up if needed.
– Keep separate emergency money.
– Do not depend on your investments during emergencies.
– Emergency fund protects your retirement portfolio.
– This keeps compounding intact.
– You can handle shocks with ease.

» Tax Awareness

– Be aware of mutual fund tax rules.
– Equity long-term gains above Rs.1.25 lakh per year are taxed at 12.5%.
– Equity short-term gains are taxed at 20%.
– Debt funds are taxed as per your slab.
– Plan redemptions wisely.
– Do not redeem often.
– Keep long-term horizon.
– This reduces tax impact.
– This helps wealth building.

» Summary of Your Retirement Possibility

– You have a good start.
– You have a workable time frame.
– You have a steady contribution.
– You must refine your portfolio.
– You must increase SIP yearly.
– You must reduce scheme count.
– You must follow asset allocation.
– You must stay disciplined.
– You must get yearly review from a CFP.
– If you follow these, you can reach a healthy retirement base.

» Final Insights

– You are on the right path.
– You have taken the key step by starting.
– You can still create a strong retirement corpus even at 47.
– Fifteen years is enough if you stay consistent.
– Your mix of equity and PPF is good.
– With discipline and structure, your future can stay secure.
– With yearly guidance, you can avoid mistakes.
– With increased SIP, you can boost your corpus.
– You can aim for a peaceful and confident retirement at 62.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Money
I am 43 yrs old, have sip in Nifty 50 - 3500 Nifty next 50 - 3000 Nippon large cap - 3500 Hdfc midcap - 2500 Parag Flexicap - 3000 Tata small cap - 1300 Gold sip - 500 Hdfc debt fund - 700, lumsum of 10000 in motilal midcap and 20k in quant small cap. accumulated around 2.30 lakhs, started from June, 2024. But overall xirr is very less 3.11. Should I continue the above sips or which sips should be stopped?
Ans: You have started early in 2024, and you already built Rs 2.30 lakhs. This shows discipline. This shows patience. This gives you a good base for your future wealth.

Your XIRR looks low now. This is normal. You started only a few months back. SIPs show low return in the start. Markets move up and down. Early numbers look flat. They look small. They look discouraging. But they improve with time. They improve with longer SIP flow. So please stay calm. The start is always slow. The finish is always strong.

Your effort is strong. Your SIP list is wide. Your savings habit is good. You started at 43 years, but you still have good time to grow your wealth. Every disciplined month builds confidence. Your choices show that you want growth. You want stability. You want balance. This is a good sign.

» Current Portfolio Snapshot
You invest in many groups.

– You invest in Nifty 50.
– You invest in Nifty Next 50.
– You invest in a large cap fund.
– You invest in a midcap fund.
– You invest in a flexicap fund.
– You invest in a small cap fund.
– You invest in gold.
– You invest in a debt fund.
– You put lumpsum in a midcap and small cap fund.

This looks wide. But wide does not mean effective. You hold too many funds in similar areas. That gives duplication. That reduces clarity. That reduces control. You need sharper structure. You need cleaner lines.

» Why Your XIRR Is Low
Your XIRR is only 3.11%. This is normal. Here is why.

– SIP started in June 2024. Very new.
– SIP amount spread across many funds.
– Market volatility in 2024 made early returns look low.
– SIP returns always look weak in early days. They grow with time.

Low short-term return is not a sign of failure. It is not a sign to stop. It is only a sign of market timing. SIP is for long periods. Not for few months.

» Problem of Index Funds in Your Portfolio
You invest in Nifty 50 and Nifty Next 50. Both are index funds. Index funds follow a fixed rule. They copy the index. They do not use research. They do not use fund manager skill. They do not adjust during bad markets. They do not protect much in down cycles. They lock you into index ups and downs.

In India, active fund managers add value. They find better stocks. They exit weak stocks faster. They manage risk better. They use research teams. They use market cycles well. They often beat index returns over long periods.

Index funds look simple. But they lack decision power. They lack flexibility. They lack protection. They give average results. They track the market exactly. They cannot outperform it.

So index funds are not the best choice for your long-term goal. Active funds give more control and more upside over long years.

» Problem of Too Many Funds
You hold too many funds across the same categories. This creates overlap. Two different schemes may hold same stocks. You think you diversify. But you repeat exposure. This weakens your plan.

Too many funds also keep your attention scattered. It reduces discipline. You waste time comparing each fund. You feel lost. You feel uncertain.

Better to keep fewer funds but stronger funds.

» Problem of Direct Funds
If any of your funds are in direct plans, please take note. Direct plans look cheaper because they have lower expense ratio. But they do not give guidance. They do not give personalised strategy. They do not give support during market falls. They do not give behavioural guidance.

Many investors make wrong moves in market dips. They stop SIPs. They redeem at the wrong time. They switch funds too often. They chase returns. This reduces wealth.

Regular plans through a Certified Financial Planner keep you disciplined. They give structure. They give long-term guidance. They reduce errors. They reduce behaviour risk. This helps more than small cost savings.

Regular plans also offer better hand-holding for asset mix, review and goal clarity. This adds real value.

» Fund-by-Fund Assessment
Let me now look at each SIP.

Nifty 50 – This is an index fund. It is passive. It is rigid. Active large-cap funds do better in many years. You may stop this over time.

Nifty Next 50 – Another index fund. Very volatile. Very narrow. You may stop this too.

Nippon large cap – This is active. This is fine. It can stay.

HDFC midcap – This is active. Good long-term category. You can keep this.

Parag flexicap – Flexicap is versatile. Useful for long-term. You can keep this.

Tata small cap – Small caps can grow well. But they need patience. They also need limited allocation. You can keep, but maintain control.

Gold SIP – Small gold SIP is okay for safety.

HDFC debt fund – Debt brings stability. Small SIP is fine.

Lumpsum in midcap and small cap – Keep these invested. They will grow with cycles.

The two index funds are the most unnecessary parts of your plan. These can be stopped. These can be replaced with good active funds already in your system.

» Suggested Structure
You need a cleaner layout.

Keep one large cap active fund.

Keep one midcap active fund.

Keep one flexicap fund.

Keep one small cap fund.

Keep one debt fund.

Keep a small gold part.

This is enough. This gives balance. It gives clarity. It gives growth. It avoids overlap. It avoids confusion.

» SIP Continuation Guidance
Here is the simple view.

Continue your large cap SIP.

Continue your midcap SIP.

Continue your flexicap SIP.

Continue your small cap SIP.

Continue gold SIP.

Continue debt SIP in small proportion.

Stop the Nifty 50 SIP.

Stop the Nifty Next 50 SIP.

Move those two SIP amounts into your existing active funds. This gives you better long-term power.

» Behaviour and Patience
Your returns will not show big numbers for now. You need time. You need patience. You need consistency. SIP is not a race. SIP is a habit. SIP grows slowly. Then it grows big.

Do not judge your plan by the first few months. Judge it after many years. That is where SIP wins. That is where compounding works. That is where discipline shines.

» What Matters More Than Fund Names
The biggest cornerstones are:

Your discipline.

Your patience.

Your time in market.

Your stable SIP flow.

Your emotional stability.

These matter more than any fund selection. You are building them well.

» Asset Mix Guidance
Your mix of equity, debt and gold is good. But you should review this once a year. As you move closer to retirement, increase debt slowly. Reduce small cap slowly. This protects you. This stabilises your progress.

A Certified Financial Planner can help align your asset mix to your goals. This adds real value. This gives stronger structure.

» Taxation View
If you redeem equity funds in future, then keep the current rule in mind. Long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakhs per year are taxed at 12.5%. Short-term gains are taxed at 20%. For debt funds, both gains are taxed as per your income slab.

This will matter only when you redeem. For now, your focus should be growth, not selling.

» Your Long-Term Wealth Path
You have good earnings years ahead. You have strong potential for growth. Your SIP habit is strong. You only need to clean your portfolio. You only need better structure. Then your money will grow well.

You can grow a meaningful corpus if you stay steady. You can even increase SIP when income grows. This gives faster results.

» Emotional Balance
Do not check returns every week. Do not check every month. Check once in six months. Check once in twelve months. SIP is a long game. Treat it like a long game.

Your small XIRR today does not decide your future. Your discipline decides it. You already have it.

» Step-by-Step Action Plan

Step 1: Stop Nifty 50 SIP.

Step 2: Stop Nifty Next 50 SIP.

Step 3: Keep all the remaining SIPs.

Step 4: Shift the stopped SIP amount into your existing large cap and flexicap funds.

Step 5: Continue gold and debt in small amounts.

Step 6: Review once a year with a Certified Financial Planner.

Step 7: Increase SIP amount slowly when income grows.

Step 8: Stay invested for long term.

Step 9: Do not judge returns too early.

Step 10: Keep your patience strong.

» Finally
Your foundation is strong. Your habit is disciplined. Your mix only needs refinement. Your returns will grow with time. Your portfolio will gain strength with consistency. Your path is steady. Your plan will reward you if you follow it with calm and clarity.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Shalini

Shalini Singh  |180 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 10, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hi. I have been in a long distance relationship since 6 months,and i have known my boyfriend since 10 months. He is very understanding, caring,and honest person. He had already told everything about us for his parents and their parents agreed. We both are financially independent. I told my relationship to my parents and they are against it as my boyfriend is from lower caste, different region, not done his degree from a reputed college but a local engineering college, and his status. They are thinking about relatives, and society what will they say, about their pride, status, and all the respect they have earned uptill now will vanish because of my decision. My parents are very protective of me and have given me everything and like me a lot.They are saying its long distance you might have met only 15 times you don't see this person daily to judge his character. If you have known this person for atleast 2/3 years, with u meeting him daily it would be different. But the person i met is honest from the start. They are hurting daily because of my decision. I cant go against them and be happy.
Ans: 1. It is wonderful you have met someone special and in last 10 months you have met him 15 times which averages to meeting him 1.5 times a month. Is it possible to increase this and meet over every second weekend. Can you both travel once.

2. Parents are parents they worry and all parents are protective of their children as are yours. But if they are declining you because of caste etc then please question them asking them to give you an assurance that if they marry you to someone of their choice things will work - In reality there can be no assurance given for any relationship - found by you or introduced by parents as relationships need work by both...both need to grow up, both of you need to be happy individuals for relationship to work + if colleges were the deciding factor then we would not see divorces of those who married in the same caste or are from Stanford, MIT, IIT, IIMs, Inseads of the world.

Here is a suggestion/ recommendation
- meet his family
- get him to meet your parents
- let both set of parents meet

all the best

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x