I have been married for more than 4 years now. But till date my husband never speaks over the phone in front of me. He always goes out of the house or moves farther away when we are out some shopping or anything like that.
He has two mobiles and never shares his mobile unlock pin or pattern. Whenever he goes out to talk over phone, I feel stressed. He doesn't even talk to his parents or sister in front of me or when I'm near or around him.
Whenever I try to talk to him about this issue, he yells at me asking why is it a problem for me if he talks over the phone?
It always ends up in an argument or fight.
How do I handle this issue? Please suggest.
Thanks and regards
Ans: Dear LK,
Some people are absolutely finicky when it comes to their privacy.
They love protecting and guarding their space and allow no one into it.
I am sure this causes you to think that there might be more to it and that’s why it has begun to bother you.
If you have been complaining about this, he mostly likely will retract and become defensive and not even offer an explanation to it.
Instead have you tried, being softer, yet assertive in a way that you make him realise that it bothers you. Also, an assurance that you are not out to stalk him or spy on his movements but give him that space where he can be free around you.
It might take time for him to release the old behaviour and form a new one, and you can simply support that change by reiterating that you are part of his journey and that it is okay for him to take a call with you and that you will not judge him for anything.
If he still doesn’t want to, I think you might consider respecting his privacy unless there is reason for you not to.
All the best!