Hi Doctor, my 22 year son is have anxiety and overthinking issue. Unable to concentrate on study and socially disconnected. Please advise

Ans: Pre-frontal cortex is part of the brain which helps us make responsible decision making. It gets fully developed by 25 years of age. Yours is developed and functioning and your boy's is in the process. Have faith, you have brought him up and he will mirror your actions, your words, the tone of voice soon. Adolescence stage a teen is looking to showcase his self-esteem and identity. Dressing up, looking a certain way is part of the routine and they love adventure. My suggestions: 1. Listen and then respond. Talk of things he does at college, ask him his dreams, help him set one goal at a time and help him to achieve them if he needs help. 2. Make visiting the native place an adventure: let him plan the journey, the time, the food to carry the presents to give everyone there. Even cajole him that he would be able to make some reels there and share with all. 3. Ask for help: be a human who has emotional needs, gets tired, needs help to finish house work. Your child would be seeing you as an established adult, who manages everything, and then imagine you are asking for help from him to do things at home. 4. Career counselling and meeting people from different professions will clear his mind to choose what he loves. 5. Attending college: Ask him about his favourite subjects, what he finds easy and difficult. Peer support and sitting with friends to revise helps to attend college. do encourage that.
Show your boy you love him but also demand from your son that he is responsible for his world. He is an adult in the eyes of law and his actions has a consequences. Money matters can be solved by giving him a fixed amount to run his week. There is a balance between discipline and respect, treat him like a young adult and not a child. You are a good parent, be kind to yourself and meet your friends too. Do revert with the progress!

Ans: It is not clear what he is suffering from. Pediatric Neurology is a broad diagnosis. If he is under the treatment of a neurologist then he / she is the best person to guide you

Ans: Dear Tapash,
Overthinking happens when you try and control the result of anything/situation. These can be from a past event or a future happening both of which are not in your control.

The simple ways to move away from overthinking are:
1. Be in the NOW; start by paying attention to what you do...even if you are brushing your teeth, observe how you are doing it, how you drink of a cup of tea/coffee, how you travel to work
2. Focus on your breath; simply observe how your breath falls and rises
3. Spend time at parks and green places; you will find yourself calming down
4. Journal; every night before you sleep, write about your day - all good and not so good
5. Express gratitude; simply being thankful can change the patterns of thinking and help you calm down

Do this everyday for a month to notice a change that you will be happy about.
If you still find that things can better, seek professional help someone who has dealt with anxiety cases. But. the one month remedy does work wonders and continue even after that month to sustain the changes...

All the best!

Ans: Hi George, You need to explain to him that formal education is a must and coding could just be a hobby and will not get him any worth while job. For example you may be a good actor but people like Anupam kher and Manoj Bajpai too went to National school of Drams -NSD to learn the craft and get some formal training. In films you can still manage but in engineering and management you cannot do without formal education. If you know any education counselor you can seek help or some one senior in the industry. Psychologist will further confuse and complicate the issue i feel.