My wife thinks I am dating my co-worker. Every time I step out for an office trip, she fights with me thinking I am going on a date. She has called up my office in the past to check and due to some miscommunication, she assumed that I didn't tell her the truth where I was. I had visited an old male friend for drinks after office whom she isn't too fond of so I didn't update her. Since that day, she has major trust issues. How can I fix this?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Trust issues are very tricky to deal with and if unchecked, it can ruin relationships. You are right to be concerned about it. The first step is understanding why she is having these trust issues. What is making her not believe you? Is it insecurities, or lack of communication, or something else altogether. The only way to understand this is open discussion. Find a time when both of you are calm and feeling relaxed. Tell her that you want to discuss this issue since this is happening over and over again. Note: tell her that you don’t like her feeling sad about something that is not even real. It makes you sad and worry about her. These words will help her understand that you are trying to work things out genuinely. Let her know that it also bothers you that she doesn’t trust you and ask her what it is that makes her think that you are lying to her. Hear her out and you might be able to point out exactly what’s happening here. Sometimes, in marriages, people start to feel less valued and trust issues can stem from that same feeling. Sometimes it’s miscommunication. It is very important to fix the matter while it is relatively new and small.

Hope this helps.