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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1040 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 02, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jun 22, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Some people fall out of love with their partners after 10-12(not precisely) years of marriage while others still crave for their partners even after the time period in marriage. Why this happens and what can we conclude from it (we know that most of the relationships fall into routine after this much period of time) ?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Honeymoon period over and then real life takes over. Responsibilities at work and at home need time and attention and also the involvement of both partners.
Now, add children into the picture and then raising them in a digital age; that's again a lot of challenges, right?
Next, caring for aged parents...
Responsibilities can rob the romance out of marriages and relationships. But with proper understanding between both partners, even during tough times, it is possible to find a silver lining.
So, put in simple words, as the relationship grows, responsibilities increase and this can cause a dent in the love life of partners. Becoming aware that this is an inevitable phase in any marriage/relationship, the couple can still act as one unit and face struggles and support one another. Love can actually increase, you know?
But, only if the couple does not resort to blame game and passing the buck. A lot of movies show this aptly with much bickering and struggles.

The key to a sound relationship is to step in and show up at all times and be committed to working together in difficult times and happy times as well...possible? Yes, possible as long as the couple make that level of commitment! That's what you actually see in couples who still are going strong 30-40 years after marriage.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/
Asked on - Jul 02, 2024 | Answered on Jul 04, 2024
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I have concluded by myself that it has something to do with foundation of relationship. If both the partners have put much efforts and investment (emotionally and physically) , they are most likely to last long while others whose relationship have formed only on short term satisfaction of when one partner is only at receiving end the love will fade once satisfaction gone or the other partner stopped making efforts. And in most cases , I believe this is true . What do you think? Thank you for reply
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Simply put, a car moves only if all the wheels move together.
Marriage/relationship moves only if both partners move together. Sometimes, you encounter differences and then instead of blaming, you work together as one unit to resolve it.
So, instead of putting an age to a relationship, just work with the concept that: For any relationship to work, the people involved in it must want it for almost the same reasons and are willing to work their differences to keep the institution functioning well.
And you end up seeing this in people who are well settled in their marriages for a long time which means they have put in a lot of work into it. But that doesn't mean all marriages/relationships that have been going on for a while are working out well. People are good at hiding things like this. So, focusing on making a relationship work together may work better rather than thinking of what time point the marriage is at!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/
Asked on - Jul 04, 2024 | Answered on Jul 04, 2024
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Thanks a lot
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are most welcome.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Dr Ashish Sehgal  |106 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 15, 2024

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Hello sir, thanks for your previous response. I am a bit curious about how relationships fall into routine and predictability. We all know that every relationship has a phase where passion wanes and people settle in routine and predictable life. But only some of them get attracted towards potential partners outside while some don't. Why this happens and is it different for men and women?
Ans: Relationships, like any dynamic process, evolve over time. Initially, there's a phase filled with excitement and discovery, often driven by passion and novelty. As time progresses, this high-energy state transitions into a more stable and predictable pattern, which can sometimes be perceived as mundane. The predictability in relationships is not inherently negative; it provides a sense of security and trust. However, the challenge lies in maintaining the balance between comfort and excitement.

Why Some People Seek Excitement Outside the Relationship:
Unmet Needs:

When certain emotional, psychological, or physical needs aren't met within the relationship, individuals might seek fulfillment elsewhere. This isn't necessarily about dissatisfaction but about finding what they feel is missing.
Desire for Novelty:

Humans are naturally inclined towards novelty and excitement. Some individuals have a higher need for variety and may seek new experiences or connections outside their relationship to satisfy this craving.
Emotional Distance:

Over time, couples can drift apart emotionally. If there's a lack of emotional intimacy or unresolved conflicts, one might look for connection outside the relationship.
Validation and Self-Esteem:

Some people seek validation and a boost in self-esteem from new admirers. This external validation can be intoxicating, especially if they feel underappreciated within their current relationship.
Differences Between Men and Women:
While individual differences often overshadow gender differences, certain trends have been observed:

Social Conditioning:

Men and women are often socialized differently, affecting their approach to relationships and infidelity. Men might be conditioned to seek multiple partners to prove their virility, while women might seek emotional connections.
Emotional vs. Physical Needs:

Generally, women may seek emotional fulfillment, while men might be more inclined towards physical satisfaction. However, this is not a rule and varies greatly among individuals.
Communication Styles:

Women often emphasize emotional sharing and communication, which can prevent emotional drift. Men might struggle with this, leading to unmet emotional needs.
Risk vs. Reward:

Men might be more willing to take risks for immediate rewards, while women might consider the broader implications and long-term effects on the family and relationship.
Maintaining Balance and Preventing Predictability:
Open Communication:

Regularly discussing desires, needs, and concerns can prevent emotional drift and unmet needs.
Shared Activities:

Engaging in new activities together can reignite the spark and bring novelty into the relationship.
Emotional Intimacy:

Building and maintaining emotional intimacy through shared experiences, empathy, and understanding can strengthen the bond.
Self-Reflection:

Individuals should reflect on their own needs and communicate them effectively. Understanding oneself is key to understanding the relationship dynamics.
Appreciation and Gratitude:

Regularly expressing appreciation and gratitude can boost self-esteem and reinforce the positive aspects of the relationship.
In the end, each relationship is unique, and understanding the individual needs and dynamics at play is essential. By fostering open communication, emotional intimacy, and mutual respect, couples can navigate the phases of their relationship with greater ease and fulfillment.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1040 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 22, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir/ma'am. Hope you are fine and doing well . I have heard it from many people that a boy falls in love quickly, his love blossoms quickly and then starts to wane. Whereas a girl falls in love slowly and her love always keeps increasing. But , in reality, I am seeing a very different picture Where many of my friends' girlfriends are getting bored of their boyfriends (my friends). In many cases they either broke up with them or cheated on them Both of them are different cases, aren't they. My question is that if a girl's love increase day by day then how can they get bored of their partners. Which one of them is true and if truth lies between them ,then please explain
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am doing well, thank you.
Now, why are you getting into the WHYs and WHATs and HOWs? This will be useful if you are researching this subject for your thesis. There is no rule or law that proves that girls are like this and boys are like that. The way LOVE happens is based on a situation, how much of compatibility exists between the couple, how much the values match and much more...If everything or almost all match, irrespective of being a boy or a girl, Love can blossom quickly.

When you see situations where cheating happens or someone falls out of love quickly, it only suggests that there was no love to begin with. It was something that satisfied them for that moment or a short while and when she/he gets bored, they will move onto another person.
Why you see more girls doing this is perhaps you are looking for cases to prove what you are thinking is right. It is not based on gender but on the reason why people/a couple get together. If the reason is beyond looks, money and other superficial things, it will last for a much longer time.
So, there's no truth or lies BUT the fact of WHAT builds love and trust between a couple that defines their being together or not.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1040 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 04, 2024

Listen
Relationship
I have concluded by myself that it has something to do with foundation of relationship. If both the partners have put much efforts and investment (emotionally and physically) , they are most likely to last long while others whose relationship have formed only on short term satisfaction of when one partner is only at receiving end the love will fade once satisfaction gone or the other partner stopped making efforts. And in most cases , I believe this is true . What do you think? Thank you for reply
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Simply put, a car moves only if all the wheels move together.
Marriage/relationship moves only if both partners move together. Sometimes, you encounter differences and then instead of blaming, you work together as one unit to resolve it.
So, instead of putting an age to a relationship, just work with the concept that: For any relationship to work, the people involved in it must want it for almost the same reasons and are willing to work their differences to keep the institution functioning well.
And you end up seeing this in people who are well settled in their marriages for a long time which means they have put in a lot of work into it. But that doesn't mean all marriages/relationships that have been going on for a while are working out well. People are good at hiding things like this. So, focusing on making a relationship work together may work better rather than thinking of what time point the marriage is at!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |4834 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 16, 2024

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I am investing : 2000 in SBI PSU mutual fund, 2000 in Quant Small Cap Fund direct growth, 1000 in SBI Small Cap Fund, 1000 in Aditya Birla PSU Equity Fund, 1000 for ICICI Infrastructure Fund . I need 20 lac after year. Pls suggest .
Ans: Current Investment Overview

You are investing Rs 7,000 monthly in various mutual funds. Your goal is to accumulate Rs 20 lakhs in one year.

Assessment of Current Portfolio

SBI PSU Mutual Fund:
Focuses on public sector units. It's sector-specific and carries higher risk.
Quant Small Cap Fund Direct Growth:
Invests in small-cap companies. High risk with potential for high returns.
SBI Small Cap Fund:
Another small-cap fund. High growth potential but volatile.
Aditya Birla PSU Equity Fund:
Similar to SBI PSU fund, with sector-specific risk.
ICICI Infrastructure Fund:
Invests in infrastructure sector. Sector-specific risks apply.

Investment Strategy Adjustment

Balanced Portfolio:
Diversify investments into balanced funds for stability. This helps mitigate sector-specific risks.

Debt Funds:
Consider investing in debt funds for stability and lower risk. They provide more predictable returns.

Equity Funds:
Maintain some investment in equity funds for growth. Choose funds with a good track record.

Achieving the Rs 20 Lakh Goal

Lump Sum Investment:
Consider a lump sum investment in a balanced fund or debt fund. This could help you reach your goal with lower risk.

Increase SIP Amount:
Increasing your SIP amount will boost your savings. Focus on funds with consistent returns.

Short-Term Debt Funds:
Invest in short-term debt funds for better returns than a savings account or FD. They are less volatile.

Final Insights

Your current investments are sector-specific and high-risk. Diversifying into balanced and debt funds will provide stability. Increasing your SIP amount or making a lump sum investment in a balanced fund can help achieve your Rs 20 lakh goal in one year.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

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Ramalingam Kalirajan  |4834 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 17, 2024Hindi
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Hi, I am 63 retired having Rs 130 lakhs in FDs. I have two apartments debt free and yearly medical insurance payment of 30000 please advise how to re-plan my investments to achieve maximum savings and with monthly expense of Rs 50000.
Ans: Current Financial Overview
Age: 63 years old
Status: Retired
Investments: Rs. 130 lakhs in fixed deposits
Assets: Two debt-free apartments
Medical Insurance: Annual payment of Rs. 30,000
Monthly Expenses: Rs. 50,000
Investment Replanning Strategy
Emergency Fund
Recommendation: Keep Rs. 10 lakhs in a liquid fund or savings account for emergencies.

Reason: This ensures quick access to funds without penalties.

Monthly Income Generation
Recommendation: Invest Rs. 60 lakhs in a mix of debt mutual funds and Senior Citizen Savings Scheme (SCSS).

Reason: Debt mutual funds offer stability and better returns than FDs. SCSS offers attractive interest rates and is a safe investment for senior citizens.

Long-term Growth
Recommendation: Allocate Rs. 40 lakhs in balanced or hybrid mutual funds.

Reason: These funds balance risk and reward, offering potential for capital appreciation while providing stability.

Health Insurance
Recommendation: Ensure your health insurance covers adequate medical expenses.

Reason: Rising healthcare costs can deplete savings quickly.

Diversification
Recommendation: Diversify Rs. 20 lakhs across different investment vehicles like corporate bonds, gold funds, or international funds.

Reason: Diversification reduces risk and enhances potential returns.

Income Strategy for Monthly Expenses
Withdrawals: Set up a systematic withdrawal plan (SWP) from debt mutual funds for monthly income.

Monthly Withdrawal: Rs. 50,000 to cover monthly expenses.

Reason: SWPs provide a regular income stream while allowing the principal to grow or remain stable.

Final Insights
Emergency Fund: Maintain Rs. 10 lakhs in a liquid fund for emergencies.

Monthly Income: Use debt mutual funds and SCSS to generate monthly income.

Long-term Growth: Invest in balanced mutual funds for growth and stability.

Health Insurance: Ensure adequate coverage for medical expenses.

Diversification: Spread Rs. 20 lakhs across different asset classes for risk management.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |4834 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 16, 2024

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Money
Hi Sir, I am 41 years old working in Dubai. My invesrment portfolio is as follows, 65 lakhs in MF, 5 lakhs in direct shares, 10 lakh in FD for emergencies. My monthly SIP is 1 lakh in a portfolio with goal of retirement in 14 years with corpus of 10 crores, current valuation is 60 lakh. And 50 thousand in a portfolio with goal of kids education in 12 years with corpus of 3 crores, current valuation is 5 lakh. I have a term plan with 1 million AED cover, no mediclaim other than company provided. No loans. Kindly advise if am well placed to achieve my goals or need to do changes to my portfolio and investments. After retirement in 14 years from now, and on reaching corpus of 10 Cr, can i withdraw 40 Lkahs annually for expenses, while my portfolio still growing by 8 to 10 percent? Thanking you in advance
Ans: Current Financial Overview
Age: 41 years old
Location: Dubai
Investment Portfolio:
Rs. 65 lakhs in mutual funds
Rs. 5 lakhs in direct shares
Rs. 10 lakhs in fixed deposits for emergencies
Monthly SIPs:
Rs. 1 lakh for retirement (goal: 10 crores in 14 years)
Rs. 50,000 for kids' education (goal: 3 crores in 12 years)
Insurance: Term plan with 1 million AED cover
Healthcare: No personal mediclaim other than company-provided
Liabilities: No loans
Analysis of Current Portfolio
Your portfolio is well-diversified across mutual funds, direct shares, and fixed deposits. You have a clear goal for retirement and your children's education, and you're investing consistently towards these goals.

Mutual Funds
65 lakhs in mutual funds: This is a solid foundation. Ensure these are diversified across large-cap, mid-cap, small-cap, and multi-cap funds to balance risk and returns.
SIPs: Your current SIPs are substantial and should help you achieve your goals if market conditions remain favorable.
Direct Shares
5 lakhs in direct shares: This adds a higher risk but potentially higher return element to your portfolio. Ensure these investments are in blue-chip companies or well-researched growth stocks.
Fixed Deposits
10 lakhs in FDs for emergencies: This is prudent and ensures liquidity in case of emergencies.
Retirement Goal
Current Situation
Current Valuation: Rs. 60 lakhs
SIP for Retirement: Rs. 1 lakh monthly
Goal: Rs. 10 crores in 14 years
Assessment
Assuming an average annual return of 12%, your current investments and SIPs should help you reach your retirement goal. Regularly review and rebalance your portfolio to stay aligned with your target.

Kids' Education Goal
Current Situation
Current Valuation: Rs. 5 lakhs
SIP for Education: Rs. 50,000 monthly
Goal: Rs. 3 crores in 12 years
Assessment
Assuming an average annual return of 12%, your current investments and SIPs should help you reach your education goal. Monitor the performance and adjust if necessary.

Additional Recommendations
Health Insurance
Personal Mediclaim: Consider taking a personal health insurance policy in addition to your company-provided cover. This ensures coverage if you change jobs or post-retirement.
Portfolio Diversification
Diversify Further: If not already done, include debt funds, international funds, and sector-specific funds to diversify and reduce risk.
Regular Reviews: Conduct annual reviews of your portfolio to ensure it's on track to meet your goals.
Withdrawal Strategy Post-Retirement
Withdraw Rs. 40 lakhs annually: Assuming an average annual portfolio growth of 8-10%, withdrawing Rs. 40 lakhs annually is feasible. However, consider a mix of systematic withdrawal plans (SWPs) and lump sum withdrawals to manage tax and liquidity.
Final Insights
Continue Current SIPs: Your current SIP amounts and portfolio composition are well-aligned with your goals.
Diversify and Review: Ensure your portfolio is diversified and regularly reviewed.
Health Insurance: Obtain a personal mediclaim policy.
Retirement Withdrawals: Plan for systematic withdrawals to sustain your portfolio growth post-retirement.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |4834 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 14, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi I am 28yrs old , my monthly in-hand salary is 1lakh , currently I am paying previous personal loans after October I'm debt free , currently I am investing ELSS mutual funds monthly 5k and lic moneback policy for monthly 5k , and investing in gold monthly 6k . Suggest me how to save money which gave me bulk amount to buy a 3bhk house in metropolitan city and retirement plan.
Ans: Current Financial Situation

You are 28 years old with a monthly in-hand salary of Rs 1 lakh. You are currently paying off personal loans, which will be completed by October. Your current investments include Rs 5,000 in ELSS mutual funds, Rs 5,000 in a LIC moneyback policy, and Rs 6,000 in gold.

Post-Debt Investment Strategy

Once your loans are cleared, you will have more disposable income. This is an excellent opportunity to reallocate your funds towards achieving your goals.

Building a House Fund

Increase SIP in Mutual Funds:

Post-October, consider increasing your ELSS SIP. Additionally, diversify into other mutual funds like large-cap, mid-cap, and multi-cap funds. This will help you build a substantial corpus over time.
Liquid Funds for Short-Term Goals:

Park a portion of your savings in liquid funds. This ensures liquidity while earning better returns than a savings account.
Fixed Deposits (FDs):

Consider investing a part in FDs for a fixed return. This adds stability to your portfolio.

Retirement Planning

Diversified Mutual Funds:

Continue with your ELSS for tax benefits and long-term growth. Also, add balanced funds and debt funds to ensure a stable return.
Public Provident Fund (PPF):

Start investing in PPF for safe, long-term returns and tax benefits. It has a lock-in period but offers attractive interest rates.
National Pension System (NPS):

Invest in NPS for retirement. It offers market-linked returns and additional tax benefits under Section 80CCD(1B).

Reevaluate LIC Policy

LIC moneyback policies typically offer lower returns. Consider switching to term insurance for higher coverage at a lower premium. Redirect the savings into mutual funds for better returns.

Gold Investments

Gold is a good hedge but typically offers lower returns. Keep it as a smaller portion of your portfolio. Diversify into other assets for better growth.

Final Insights

To buy a 3BHK in a metropolitan city, you need a disciplined savings and investment approach. Increase your mutual fund SIPs post-debt, start a PPF and NPS, and reevaluate your LIC policy. Diversifying your investments will help you build a substantial corpus for both your house and retirement.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |4834 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 16, 2024

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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