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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  | Answer  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 26, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Dec 16, 2025Hindi
Relationship

Hi I am married for 24 years. Our was a love cum arranged marriage. But within 3-4 months of our marriage we had to leave my father's house due some dispute between me and my father. We shifted to a rental home. We have two sons who are now grown up. Our family life was good. In the year 2019 I got a job in Kenya. I was working there on bachelor status. My family was staying back in mumbai and wife was also working. I visited my family very year for a month on holiday. In December 2024 I lost my job and came back to Mumbai. I was jobless for 6 months. Since July I have started working in a small firm for survival. Physically both of us are not active since 4 years. Now I feel like reconnecting with her physically and emotionally. But I feel like she is a changed person. She doesnt have any emotions for me. If I try to even touch her she gives me a scary look. Please tell me how to handle this situation. I want her back in my life.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I suggest trying to connect with her emotionally first. You have been away from her for the better part of your married life. It does take a toll on the partner who is left behind to take care of everything back home. I’ll say start small; buy her small but meaningful things when you are coming back from the office; maybe some snacks she likes. Take her for a movie date, or a dinner date; ask someone else to take care of the kids. Plan a vacation together. A lot of problems dissolve naturally when people reconnect emotionally. If it still doesn’t work, I would urge you to have an open conversation and genuinely ask her what is missing in the marriage so that you can work on it. A happy and healthy marriage requires constant effort. I am sure she is worth it.

Hope this helps

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1807 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 16, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 09, 2023Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi Anu, I am 39 Year Old Male and My wife is 37 years old, we are married for 12 years. We have 2 kids (A Son Aged 9 Years) and a daughter aged (2 years). We had good and bad both times during 12 years of our marriage. However it was my anger on petty issues which lead to multiple quarrels over the period. Last month again we had fight and my wife left home without my or my family knowladge along with both our kids to my in-laws. During this 1 month of seperation i realized my mistakes and are ready to amend it, but my wife lacks trust now. We are not in touch since she has left as she has blocked my number and send me court notice of maintenance also (Ofcourse notice has lot of lies also). No i have understood my family's values and unable to bear such distance from both wife and kids. What my wife is thinking i dont know. Financially i have always kept her happy but due to my quarrels things have gone bad now. Please advice what should be way forward for me and what should i do to bring my family back. PLEASE GUIDE!
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Ego trips have divided the two of you considerably.
Seek the help of an elder member of a family who will act like a go-between and a mediator. He/She must be neutral and unbiased as well.
This helps in having a smooth flow in a conversation between you and your wife where both of you can our in your woes and also be clear on whether either of you want the marriage to continue or not. Also, take into account the children and their welfare as they are very young and any decision taken will impact them in one or many ways.
If this mediation fails, kindly seek the help of a marriage therapist/counselor even this means sharing 'stuff' with a total stranger. Most often that stranger will be the person to facilitate a smooth reconciliation if the couple also wants the same.

All the best!

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  | Answer  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 07, 2026

Relationship
Hello Dr, I am married for 24 years. Our was love cum arranged marriage. But within 3-4 months of our marriage we had leave my fathers house due some dispute between me and my father. We shifted to a rental home. We have 2 son who now grown up. Our family life was good. In the year 2019 I got a job in Kenya. I was working there on bachelors status. My family was staying back in mumbai and wife is also working. I visited my family very year for a month on holiday. In Dec'2024 I lost my job and came back to mumbai. I was jobless for 6 months. Since July I have started working in a small firm for survival. Physically We both are not active since 4 years. Now I feel like to reconnect with her physically and emotionally. But dont know she is a changed person. She doesnt have emotions for me. If I try to even touch her she gives me a scary look. Please tell me how should I handle this situation. I want her back in my life.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I suggest trying to connect with her emotionally first. You have been away from her for the better part of your married life. It does take a toll on the partner who is left behind to take care of everything back home. I’ll say start small; buy her small but meaningful things when you are coming back from the office; maybe some snacks she likes. Take her for a movie date, or a dinner date; ask someone else to take care of the kids. Plan a vacation together. A lot of problems dissolve naturally when people reconnect emotionally. If it still doesn’t work, I would urge you to have an open conversation and genuinely ask her what is missing in the marriage so that you can work on it. A happy and healthy marriage requires constant effort. I am sure she is worth it.

Hope this helps

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1807 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 31, 2026Hindi
Relationship
I have been married for 24 years, and ours was a love marriage. We have two sons who are now grown up, and for most of our married life, things were stable and peaceful between us. Over the years, like many couples, we got busy with responsibilities, work, children, and daily life. Slowly our emotional and physical connection started fading without us even realising it. For the past few years, especially after our children became independent, I have started feeling a sense of emptiness in our relationship. We live in the same house but hardly talk beyond basic daily conversations. There is no warmth, no affection, and we have not been physically close for a long time. Recently, when I tried to initiate closeness or even simple gestures like holding her hand, she seemed uncomfortable like I am some stranger. I was very hurt but I didn't react. I still care deeply for her and want to rebuild our bond. I don’t know if she has emotionally moved on, lost interest in the relationship, or if this is just a phase many long-term marriages go through. How can I win her back in my life?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Raising kids, family responsibilities and duties can somehow push the spark of marriage to a bare minimum and before you know it, the communication breakdown will make you believe that there the marriage is over. But it's far from over; in fact it's a wake-up call to RESET and plunge back into understanding why you married your wife and not just anybody else.
It's important to count on what you add to each other and value what you bring to the marriage. Once you neutralize it to a point where you are willing to put in the hard work necessary to reset the marriage, half your is done. Start with intimate (emotional) conversations and do things with one another. I always suggest date nights to bring back that fun and no-care in the world feeling, It can ignite a lot of passion back into the marriage. Start...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11374 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 10, 2026

Money
Regarding For Health Insurance And Term Insurance Me Age 31 Wife Age 24 Son Age 3 Mom AGE 50 DAD Age 55 Please Suggust Good Health Insurance Please Suggust Term Insurance Also For me Thanks Please Sugg
Ans: You are starting insurance planning at the right age. At 31, term insurance is usually much cheaper than later.

» Health Insurance

I would not put everyone into one common policy.

A practical structure would be:

– You, wife and son: family floater policy.
– Mother and father: separate senior-age health policies.
– Avoid mixing parents with your young family.
– Consider a strong base cover with a suitable super top-up.
– Check room-rent limits, co-payment and disease waiting periods.
– Check the insurer network near your residence.
– Check claim settlement process and policy exclusions.

For your parents, premiums can be much higher at ages 50 and 55.
So compare plans carefully before selecting one.

» Your Term Insurance

At age 31, term insurance is important because your wife and son depend on your income.

The required cover should consider:

– Your current income.
– Outstanding loans, if any.
– Child education.
– Family living expenses.
– Future financial responsibilities.

As a broad starting point, a Rs.1.5 crore to Rs.2 crore cover can be evaluated.

The policy should ideally continue until your major financial responsibilities reduce.

Choose pure term insurance only.

Avoid combining insurance with investment products.

» Important Point

Health insurance and term insurance serve different purposes.

Health insurance protects your savings from medical expenses.

Term insurance protects your family from loss of income.

Both should be treated as protection, not investment.

» Before Choosing Any Policy

Please compare:

– Claim settlement terms
– Waiting periods
– Permanent exclusions
– Co-payment conditions
– Room-rent restrictions
– Restoration benefits
– Lifetime renewal
– Network hospitals
– Premium increases
– Policy wording

Do not select only because the premium is lowest.

» Final Insights

Your young family needs a good health cover and adequate term cover.

Keep your parents separately insured.

For you, evaluate Rs.1.5 crore to Rs.2 crore term cover.

For health insurance, the exact recommendation needs your city and budget.

Also, disclose all existing medical conditions honestly while purchasing.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

AMFI-Registered MFD – ARN 4188

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11374 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 10, 2026

Money
Hi Sir, i am a Accountant, i am married , i have one kid with age of 3, now i am planing to Reshape my Mutual Fund Protfolio, could you advice is this correct. Now My AGE 31 I am planing until my Age 40 and After 5 Year 1 Start to SWP From That Funds 1 . parag parik flexicap fund - Monthly 6K 2 . zerodha nifty large & Mid 250 elss fund - Monthly 4K 3 . Motilal Oswal Mid cap - Monthly 3K 4. Banthan Small Cap - Monthly 2K 5 . Nippon India Gold Saving Fund - 2 K NOTE : Every Year 10% Increse SIP Amount total 10 Year Horizon and i need money from after 5 Year I start SWP can i go long term this funds or need to rebalance
Ans: You have started quite early, which is a big advantage. At age 31, your long-term compounding period is strong. Your 10% annual SIP increase is also a very good habit.

» Your Present Strategy

Your total monthly SIP is Rs.17,000.

The broad allocation is:

– Flexi-cap: Rs.6,000
– Large and mid-cap index: Rs.4,000
– Mid-cap: Rs.3,000
– Small-cap: Rs.2,000
– Gold: Rs.2,000

The allocation is reasonably diversified.

But one important issue needs attention.

You want to start SWP after only 5 years.

Five years is not a very long period for an equity-heavy portfolio.

» Main Concern With The Five-Year SWP

If you definitely need money after five years, do not keep the entire corpus in equity.

Markets can fall sharply around your SWP starting date.

This can force you to sell units at low prices.

A better approach is goal-based investing.

– Years 1 to 3: Equity can have a larger role.
– Around year 4: Start reducing risk for the required amount.
– By year 5: Keep the next few years SWP requirement in safer assets.
– Let the remaining long-term money stay invested for growth.

This can make your SWP much more comfortable.

» About The Large And Mid-Cap Index Fund

This is the part I would reconsider.

An index fund simply follows its chosen index.

It does not actively select companies based on changing business conditions.

It also cannot avoid a company merely because its future outlook has weakened.

An actively managed fund gives the fund manager flexibility.

The manager can change stocks based on valuations, earnings and business quality.

Since you are planning long-term wealth creation, active management can be useful.

I would therefore review this allocation and consider an actively managed diversified category instead.

» Mid-Cap And Small-Cap Exposure

Having both mid-cap and small-cap exposure can help long-term growth.

But these categories can fluctuate heavily.

Since you want money after five years, do not increase these allocations aggressively.

Your 10% annual SIP increase is good.

But future increases should not automatically go into small-cap funds.

» Gold Allocation

Your Rs.2,000 monthly gold allocation is reasonable.

Gold can provide diversification.

It can also help during periods of equity market stress.

I would keep gold as a supporting allocation, not the main growth component.

» Should You Continue These Funds For Ten Years?

The investment horizon and withdrawal horizon are different.

You can continue investing for 10 years.

But if money is required from year 5, that portion needs separate planning.

Do not assume that every fund must be held unchanged for ten years.

Review the portfolio once every year.

Fund selection, allocation and your financial goals can change over time.

» How I Would Reshape It

I would keep the portfolio simpler.

– One strong diversified equity fund as the core.
– One mid-cap allocation for additional growth.
– Limited small-cap exposure.
– A modest gold allocation.
– Avoid unnecessary duplication.
– Replace the index allocation with a suitable actively managed category.
– Create a separate safer bucket for the five-year requirement.

You do not need many funds to build wealth.

» Your 10% SIP Increase

Please continue this habit.

It can become more important than selecting the perfect fund.

Whenever your salary increases:

– Increase SIPs first.
– Maintain your emergency fund.
– Increase investments towards your childs future.
– Avoid increasing lifestyle expenses at the same speed.

Your child is only 3 years old.

You have a very good time horizon for that goal.

» SWP Planning

Do not start SWP merely because five years are completed.

Start SWP when the money is actually required.

Before starting SWP:

– Identify the required monthly amount.
– Keep near-term withdrawals in safer assets.
– Keep long-term money invested for growth.
– Review the withdrawal rate every year.
– Rebalance when equity exposure becomes too high.

This approach can protect the portfolio from unnecessary selling during market falls.

» Regular Funds Through MFD

Since you are planning a long-term portfolio, consider investing through an AMFI-registered MFD.

Regular funds can provide ongoing portfolio support.

You also get help with reviews, rebalancing and goal planning.

Direct investing can work for disciplined investors who manage everything themselves.

But many investors change funds based on recent performance.

An MFD can help maintain discipline through market cycles.

» Final Insights

Your basic portfolio structure is good.

The main correction is your five-year SWP plan.

Do not keep the entire portfolio equity-oriented until the SWP starts.

Also review the index allocation.

I would prefer a simpler actively managed portfolio with clear roles.

Continue the 10% annual SIP increase.

Most importantly, separate your five-year requirement from your long-term wealth.

With 10+ years of disciplined investing, you have a strong opportunity to build meaningful wealth.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

AMFI-Registered MFD – ARN 4188

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11374 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 09, 2026

Money
Sir I have nearly 35 MF scheme. I have 4 Manu facturing fund. Axis mau facturing fund.. Canara Robecco Manu. fund G(SIP2000) Invesco Manufacturing fund G(SIP 2000 PM ). ICICI Manufacturing fund G Advise how to cut down or exit and invest in other fund continuing only one preferably ICICI. Then I have following non performing Funds Axis consumption fund G regular Hdfc Multcap Fund G regular Hdfc Multcap 50/25/25Index fund Direct Hdfc Tech. Fund D Growth Hsbc India Export Indis export Opp. D Growth ICICI opp. Fund D Growth SUNDARAM mutiasst allocation fund R . G SIP TATA NIFTY AUTO INDEX FUNDNIFTY G DIR. TATA NIFTY IND. TOURISM INDEX FUND G DIR. Above mentioned funds not performing. Your advise whether to and reinvest in an alternative fund. Overlaping funds ICICI prudential energy opportunities fund D SIP GROWTH SBI ENERGY OPP. FUND D. GROWTH 2) FRANKLIN IND. FLEXI CAP FUND R G. 20 UNIT HDFC FLEXICAP FUND R. G. 25 UNIT ICICI PRUDENTIAL FLEXI CAP R. G 3000 Unit TATA mid cap fund R. G. 175 unit UTI MID CAP FUND R. G. 200 Unit HDFC MID CAP FUND R G 250 UNIT Request detailed scrutiny and how to minimise. Besides l have following funds performing well Aditya Birla Sun Life focused fund HDFC Defence fund HDFC PHARMA FUND HDFC TRANSPORTATION FUND HSBC VALUE FUND HSBC ELSS FUND ICICI PRU.PHRMA & HEALTHCARE FUND UTI NIFTY 500 VALUE INDEX FUND I am 82 years old. No liability . Other investments like PPF BANK FD GOLD ANCESTRAL LAND PM ANNUITY PLAN RENT 15 LAKH health insurance. Equities of 5 lakhs Expenses very basic. Would like to re invest. for better returns. Waiting for your early reply. Your 's sincerely ..... ... V. G. Nadig
Ans: You have built substantial financial assets and, importantly, you have no liabilities. At age 82, the priority should now be simplicity, safety, liquidity and reasonable growth. Having nearly 35 mutual fund schemes is unnecessarily high.

» First Priority

– Reduce the MF portfolio substantially.
– Avoid managing many sector and thematic funds.
– Avoid keeping funds only because they performed well recently.
– Keep a smaller number of diversified funds.
– Keep sufficient money in safer assets for your regular needs.

At your age, chasing maximum returns is not necessary.

» Manufacturing Funds

You currently have four manufacturing funds:

– Axis Manufacturing
– Canara Robeco Manufacturing
– Invesco Manufacturing
– ICICI Prudential Manufacturing

There is considerable overlap in this allocation.

I would not keep four manufacturing funds.

If you have a strong preference for the ICICI Prudential Manufacturing Fund, keeping one manufacturing fund can be considered.

The other three can be reviewed for exit and consolidation.

However, do not switch all four on one day blindly. Check capital gains and exit loads first.

» Funds You Mentioned As Non-Performing

You mentioned:

– Axis Consumption
– HDFC Multicap
– HDFC Multicap 50/25/25 Index
– HDFC Technology
– HSBC India Export Opportunities
– ICICI Prudential Opportunities
– Sundaram Multi Asset Allocation
– Tata Nifty Auto Index
– Tata Nifty India Tourism Index

I would not judge these funds only by recent returns.

Some are sector, thematic or index-oriented funds.

They can have long periods of underperformance.

For an 82-year-old investor, I would reduce such complexity.

The index-oriented funds especially do not need to be retained simply for diversification.

» Energy Fund Overlap

You have exposure to:

– ICICI Prudential Energy Opportunities
– SBI Energy Opportunities

There is no strong need to hold two funds in the same sector.

Keep only one if you want sector exposure.

But given your age, even this allocation should remain limited.

» Flexi Cap Overlap

You currently have:

– Franklin India Flexi Cap
– HDFC Flexi Cap
– ICICI Prudential Flexi Cap

This is another clear area for consolidation.

Three flexi-cap funds are unnecessary.

You can retain one suitable flexi-cap fund.

The remaining two can gradually be consolidated after checking taxation and exit loads.

» Mid Cap Overlap

You have:

– Tata Mid Cap
– UTI Mid Cap
– HDFC Mid Cap

Again, three funds are not required.

Keep one suitable mid-cap fund if your overall portfolio needs this exposure.

However, at age 82, I would not maintain a large mid-cap allocation.

This money can be more useful in diversified and relatively stable investments.

» Funds Performing Well

You mentioned:

– Aditya Birla Sun Life Focused
– HDFC Defence
– HDFC Pharma
– HDFC Transportation
– HSBC Value
– HSBC ELSS
– ICICI Prudential Pharma & Healthcare
– UTI Nifty 500 Value Index

Good past performance alone should not decide whether you retain them.

You have multiple sector and thematic exposures here too.

For example, you already have two healthcare-oriented funds.

Defence and transportation are also thematic exposures.

I would reduce the number of such specialised funds.

» A Better Portfolio Structure

Your portfolio can be simplified into a few clear roles:

– Core diversified equity allocation
– Limited mid-cap allocation
– Limited thematic allocation, if required
– Suitable conservative allocation
– Adequate cash and fixed-income allocation

You do not need 35 schemes to achieve diversification.

Around 5 to 7 carefully selected funds can be more than sufficient.

» Very Important At Age 82

Your investment objective should now be different from that of a 40-year-old investor.

Capital preservation is important.

Liquidity is also very important.

You should have enough safe money for several years of expenses.

Equity should mainly serve the purpose of long-term inflation protection.

Do not put money required for near-term expenses into equity.

» About Reinvesting After Exit

I would not immediately reinvest every redemption into another equity fund.

First identify how much money you need for:

– Regular expenses
– Medical requirements
– Family support
– Emergency needs
– Future personal requirements

The remaining long-term surplus can then be invested.

This approach will make your portfolio much safer and easier to manage.

» Your Other Assets

Your FD, PPF, gold, ancestral land, annuity income and rental income provide additional diversification.

Your basic expenses are also low.

This is a positive position.

Therefore, there is no need to take excessive equity risk for higher returns.

» How I Would Approach The 35 Funds

Do it in three stages.

First, identify sector and thematic duplication.

Second, identify overlapping diversified categories.

Third, consolidate the portfolio gradually.

Do not sell everything together.

Review taxation and exit loads before each redemption.

The money released should then be allocated according to your income and liquidity requirements.

» Final Insights

You have done well in building a large and diversified investment base.

The main issue now is not lack of diversification.

It is excessive diversification.

35 schemes can make monitoring difficult and may create hidden overlap.

I would aim for a much simpler portfolio.

Your manufacturing, energy, flexi-cap and mid-cap holdings are the first areas I would consolidate.

I would also reduce excessive thematic exposure.

At 82, stability and peace of mind should come before chasing the highest possible return.

A detailed scheme-wise review would be useful before redeeming anything. It should consider current value, purchase value, gains, taxation, SIP status and exit load for every scheme.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

AMFI-Registered MFD – ARN 4188

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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