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Dr Upneet

Dr Upneet Kaur  | Answer  |Ask -

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Jul 09, 2025

Dr Upneet Kaur is a medical professional and therapist based out of Amritsar.
After completing her bachelor’s degree in Ayurvedic medicine and surgery from the SKSS Ayurvedic College and Hospital, Sarabha, Punjab, in 2008, she worked as a medical officer at various multi-specialty hospitals in Punjab, handling both physical and mental patient care and clinical decision-making. She spent the next decade leading multidisciplinary teams at various levels.
Since 2022, she has been practising as a clinical psychologist and marriage counsellor.
Dr Upneet also holds an MBA in hospital management from Alagappa University, Tamil Nadu, and an MA in psychology from the Indira Gandhi National Open University.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jun 27, 2025Hindi
Relationship

I have been married since 2021.I live with my mom, sister, brother and wife.Since beginning my wife is not getting along with my mother and sister.Also father in law,mother in law and specially my brother in law get involved in every fight.The fights are so worse that even neighbours come and say few things.We have been to police station also one time where my wife has put dowry allegations against me and my family.My mother and sister do not let anything slide by my wife and always keep searching for reason to fight with her and accuse me of taking her side.I have tried to create balance between them but I am exhausted and I am failing at everything please help me

Ans: Hello sir. This situation arises in many houses specially in India. One solution to this situation is that you and your wife should live seperately from your family. That ways conflicts will be avoided and you can come on weekends to meet your parents.
Secondly make it a habit of not telling your personal issues to your parents. This applies to your parents as well as your wife's parents. Try to solve your matters privately. Otherwise interfere of any other person will always increase the conflict.
Thirdly sit with your parents calmly and explain them the reasons of taking your wife's side. You can tell them that you have a responsibility towards your wife also. I hope this helps.
Regards
Dr Upneet Kaur
Follow me on:
https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 04, 2024

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I am married person since 2015. From last 2 to 3 years it is not working properly. Due to some following problems, 1. I am only one boy in my family. I don’t have any brother or sister. My father is also passed away, so there is need of child in my family because now I am at the age of 30. But my wife is not physically strong. There is always some health issue with her. 2. There is education gap too in between us. She is metric level education and I am engineer. Due to this we don’t have that much effective communication leads to conflicts in every situation. She never give respect to my mother and never do regular house works to and at the end of the day again conflicts arises between my mother and my wife. 3. I want to give divorce to her but unfortunately she is purposely not ready for that because she knows very well that she will never been happy in another house like my house. 4. Same problem when I discussed with her mother and father, they straight forward refuse to give divorce; they said, “if you have any problems or want to give divorce then go to those person who are responsible for marriage or who finalize your marriage”. Lastly, I am now at dead end and don’t know the solution of how to escape from this situation.
Ans: Dear Rajesh,
First and foremost, it's important to prioritize your own well-being and happiness, as well as that of any potential children involved. While divorce may seem like the only solution, it's also worth considering seeking professional help, such as marriage counseling or therapy, to try to address the issues in your relationship and explore potential avenues for improvement.

If communication is a significant challenge due to education and cultural differences, a therapist or counselor can help facilitate more effective communication and understanding between you and your wife. They can also provide guidance on how to navigate conflicts and differences in a constructive manner.

Additionally, it may be helpful to involve a neutral third party, such as a religious or community leader, to mediate discussions between you, your wife, and your respective families. They may be able to provide support and guidance in finding a resolution that is mutually acceptable and respects the well-being of all parties involved.

Ultimately, the decision to pursue divorce or to work on improving the relationship is a deeply personal one, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution. It's important to take the time to carefully consider your options and seek support from trusted friends, family members, or professionals as needed.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1822 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 06, 2024

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Relationship
Hi Madam, I am married (arrange marriage) for 10 years with a son of 8 years, I am middle class person and giving Home loan EMI also, because of which no money is saved. My problem is that my wife always demands money and fights for it. She is all aware of my income and expenditures of every month (I have prepared a list and shares with her). I have no habits of alcohol or smoking, but she always fights with me that I spends money on my bad habits and on friends. She always say that you don't take me outside , don't spend on me and blah blah...(I do take her to movies and wherever she wants to go with me or with her friends). She is very short tempered that I avoids talking to her but she finds a chance for fight. For her demands, I left my parental flat and mother and lived with her in a rented house for 5 years and now purchased an independent home also. But, I am fed up of her demands and fights. She even fights when our son is around and even comes near my body as if she wants to hurt me....(although we never had a physical fight). I am very afraid. For your information, she also works as a teacher in a private nursery school (pays half of our home loan EMI) and she is from village background. My father expired long back and mother is living with my younger brother. I even don't meet my close friends frequently (once or twice in a month) because of her fear, as when I meet them she fights on this issue also. I want peace in my life. Kindly help.
Ans: Dear Sunil,
This needs a bit more of finding out what exactly is going on? What is the root cause of anger and the blame game with your wife?
Whatever I suggest will just be a BAND-AID solution and things will flare up yet again. There is deep-seated anger and insecurities rising (from what I understand from you.
The only thing I can say is; spend time with her on an emotional level and maybe this will ease her emotional highs and lows. But, I do feel it is time to have an intervention where as a Couple you are given to tools to work on your relationship.
Do see an expert who specializes in marriage therapy/counseling. They will be able to guide you in a very structured fashion as to how to re-start and re-build your marriage.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna  |1822 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 18, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 14, 2024Hindi
Relationship
Hi dear Anu Krishna Madam, I am a regular reader of your suggestions and answers on the questions of relationships since long. You are doing a great work to solve the complications of people's life. I have a long story actually, thanks to you in advance for your patience in reading this. I am male 36 YO, married and having a 4 YO daughter. Mandatory to mention here that I have mother who is dependent on me financially as my father passed away years ago. My relationship with my not been since starting as we got married in 2015. She is having serious anger issues and starts fighting on even little things. She is not very inclined to my mother and my younger sister who got married in 2018 and staying in UK with her husband. My wife is always complaining for one thing or the other. I am working for Central Government and earning well but she is never satisfied and keeps on complaining that my brother in law (sister's husband) is better husband or sometimes compare with other men. I always to fulfil all the requirements financially as well as taking care of baby, helping in household chores but she is never a happy woman. I send my mother and amount of Rs 10000 per month as no one is there to take care of her, mother stays at our hometown and I along with my wife and daughter stays at my work place city. I had to finance the marriage of my younger sister also as my father passed away when the both of us siblings were of age 7 and 3, this was told before my marriage to the family of wife as well as her that this will be required to be managed by me financially. But she complains of this also that I have spent this much money on my sister and mother. I am earning from a young age of 18 years but I don't find any peace at home. I am working like a machine, earning and then she is saying bad things to me all the time. She shouts loudly when fighting so that neighbours also listen and I find it very shameful. Her behaviour towards our daughter also changes frequently and she treats her according to her mood. My mother is not staying with us as when she stayed here for 6-8 months due to her health related issues, she started fighting with my mother also and created huge scenes every now and then. My wife's only attachment is with her own family, her mother, father, unmarried elder sister and unmarried elder brother. Her both the siblings couldn't find suitable matches for themselves, this is also creating a stress for my wife and she in the end throws her frustration on me. She and my self have both tried to commit suicide 2-3 times in the fight on different occasions. Last year she met a younger boy of age 26-27 and they both got attracted to each other. I was along with her and I noticed them smiling at each other at a function. I asked my wife and said to her that if you want to you can ask and talk to that boy. Means I told her to have an open marriage, in the hope that this will atleast make her realise that my husband is happy in my happiness. They both started talking and even met on 3-4 occasions and 2-3 of them secret meetings at our home (only i knew that I didn't pointed out) with physical intimacy. Now due to some unknown reason both my wife and that boy are not talking to each other. Her behaviour had been very rude since that boy came to her life and she never realised that my husband is not pointing out this infidelity also. Now, when that boy is also not there, her disrespect towards me is increasing day by day. She starts fighting even at streets and shouting loudly. I have also given a thought for legal separation but due to my daughter I am not going ahead. I am in a very complex situation and don't understand what to do. How i can make her understand that relationship runs on two people. Please guide me further. One more thing to mention here she is not interested to go for councelling or anything like that. Thanks in advance. Regards.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your wife is perhaps one of those people who choose to see what's not happening rather than what good is actually happening. It's just a habit that can destroy their peace of mind and of those around them.
You are caught around her drama where she tries to find her happiness all around her when she can perfectly find it within the marriage. So, if there's something small that upsets her at home or does not go according to the way she thinks it should, instead of talking about it to you, she is someone who will find a way out outside and in things that can instantly make her feel better. That 27-year-old has ended up becoming some sort of a distraction and by you allowing it to go further whatever happens or doesn't will be blamed on you.
She's acting like a child in need of attention, incapable of addressing her own emotions, distracting herself with a new toy and then crying out creating drama around it all and oh, blaming you when things go wrong.
Got the picture, here? So, the way out is to actually take her to a professional who can guide her to regulate her thoughts an =d actually infuse her back into a family system. It's possible that her maternal home did not provide a great example in this regard...you might know better...
You can try and get through to her by requesting her to step in for your child's sake else the marriage can deteriorate further...So, give it a try.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Krishna Kumar  |427 Answers  |Ask -

Workplace Expert - Answered on Oct 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 06, 2026
Career
What should an employee do if the person they are supposed to report harassment or discrimination to is actually the same person involved in the problem? For example, suppose a senior manager regularly makes inappropriate comments about an employee’s appearance or background, and the employee wants to complain, but the company’s usual process says that concerns should first be reported to that manager. In such a situation, the employee may feel stuck because going directly to the same person doesn’t feel safe or comfortable. What alternative channels should an employee look for, such as HR, a higher-level manager, an internal complaints committee or an ethics helpline? Also, how can someone raise the concern professionally while protecting themselves from possible retaliation or further workplace problems?
Ans: Dear

I am sorry to hear that you are going through a tough time. Nonetheless there is a way to handle this.

If you have ethics helpline use that, these are supposed to be anonymous and managed by third party who are independent company.

You can also approach the complaints committee but before escalating to the committee please talk to your managers manager along with the HR and take them in confidence.

Maintain your calm, structure your conversation on issues and backed with evidence (what was said when) and most important of all avoid personal attacks or name calling.

Hope this helps. All the best.

Warm Regards
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Ps: if you like the answer please follow me. Thanks.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |747 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 01, 2026
Relationship
My wife's sister's husband has become very friendly with me over the last few years. We meet often at family functions and sometimes talk separately about our personal lives. In the beginning, I was comfortable sharing things with him because I thought we had a good understanding. But slowly, I feel he has started asking too many questions about my marriage and my relationship with my wife. He sometimes asks about our arguments, our private matters and how we handle things at home. At the same time, he also shares many personal details about his own marriage with me, including problems and things that I feel are too private. Sometimes I don’t know how to respond, because I don’t want to encourage him to discuss such personal matters, but I also don’t want him to feel that I am avoiding him or judging him. Because we are family, I am worried that if I suddenly create distance or tell him directly to stop asking personal questions, it could create awkwardness between both families. I also don’t want my wife to feel that I am hiding something from her or that there is some problem between us.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand your concerns. You don't have to directly confront him about sharing too many personal details or asking you questions, nor do you need to create distance. The sweet spot is to build a gentle boundary. For instance, when he asks you something personal, instead of avoiding the question, just answer vaguely, like, "yes, things are going good" or "Nothing major. You know, routine married life stuff." This way, he will soon lose interest. And when he shares personal information with you, you can simply listen without offering any advice or asking follow-up questions. The conversation will die down on its own. This way, he will neither feel like you are avoiding a conversation with him nor believe that you are encouraging him to get up close and personal with you.

Most importantly, do not hide this friendship from your wife. It's okay. Friends do share things with each other at times and sometimes one person might feel burdened with too many information after a while. These are natural courses of a friendship. The important thing is that you are being considerate of your marriage and want to create a boundary. You can do that without being misunderstood or losing a friend.

Hope this helps.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11481 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 06, 2026

Money
Dear Sir/ Mam, My son is 28 years old. Should I buy a Term Insurance Policy for him? If so, suggest me name of Good policy and the suitable amount to be invested . rgds,
Ans: At age 28, taking term insurance can be considered, especially if your son has started earning and has financial responsibilities.

However, the policy should ideally be taken by your son himself. The need depends on his income, liabilities and dependants.

– If he has a home loan or other liabilities, adequate cover becomes more important.

– If parents, spouse or children depend on his income, insurance becomes even more relevant.

– If he is unmarried and has no financial dependants, the immediate need may be lower, but taking cover at a younger age can still be cost-effective.

» How much cover?

Do not decide the cover only based on his age.

Consider:

– Current annual income.

– Existing loans and liabilities.

– Financial support required by dependants.

– Future family responsibilities.

– Existing life insurance, if any.

A broad starting point can be around 10–15 times annual income, but the final cover should be based on his actual financial situation.

» Who should pay the premium?

Ideally, your son should own the policy and pay the premium.

This keeps the policy connected with his income and financial responsibilities.

You can certainly help him with the premium if required.

» Which policy?

I would not suggest a particular insurance company or policy without knowing his income, liabilities, health, smoking status and existing insurance.

Instead, compare established insurers on:

– Claim settlement record.

– Solvency and financial strength.

– Policy exclusions and conditions.

– Premium for the required tenure.

– Claim servicing quality.

Avoid buying an insurance policy merely because somebody promises investment returns or other benefits along with the insurance.

For a pure protection requirement, a simple term insurance policy is generally easier to understand.

» Final Insights

At 28, your son has a good opportunity to put proper protection in place before his financial responsibilities increase.

The important point is to decide the required cover first and then compare suitable policies.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
AMFI-Registered MFD – ARN 4188
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.linkedin.com/in/ramalingamcfp/

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |12579 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Oct 06, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 25, 2026
Career
Hi experts I am raising the query on behalf of my son:- My son is doing his Final BCom(F&A)with Christ Bangalore- Also completed CA-Inter and undergoing internship at Bangalore. My query is:- a.With B.Com-CA-Inter- what is the job scope in India? b.Any chance to get Overseas placements- If yes- which country is preferable and how to proceed for job search. c.Any further courses needs to be completed along with B.Com-CA-? Submitted for your kind perusal and advice please. Thanks Srikanth
Ans: With B.Com + CA-Inter, there are good opportunities in India in audit, taxation, financial reporting, FP&A, internal audit and finance/shared-services roles. For overseas opportunities, it is better to focus on completing CA first. UAE can be a good starting option, while Singapore offers opportunities with MNCs; the UK, Canada and Australia can also be explored based on qualification and work-visa requirements. The ideal strategy would be to complete CA, gain 2–3 years of relevant experience with a Big 4 firm or reputed company, and then explore overseas opportunities through ICAI, LinkedIn, company career pages and internal transfers within MNCs. After CA, he can consider ACCA for international accounting, CFA for investment/finance roles, US CPA for US-focused accounting/MNCs, or shorter courses in IFRS, Advanced Excel, Power BI and SAP, depending on his career goals. If CA Final gets delayed, he can take up a suitable private-sector role in audit, taxation or financial analysis while continuing CA. ACCA, CMA or CS can also be considered after checking exemptions. If he prefers government employment, exams such as SSC CGL/AAO and RBI Grade B can be explored. Maintaining an active LinkedIn profile and setting relevant job alerts will also help him understand current hiring trends, skill requirements and opportunities and make informed short- and long-term career decisions. All The Best for Your Son's Prosperous Future!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know More on 'Careers | Money | Health | Relationships'.
Asked on - Oct 06, 2026 | Answered on Oct 06, 2026
Thank you very much sir for your valuable guidance.
Ans: Welcome Sir.

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