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Wife showed her breast to male doctor - Should I continue the marriage?

Dr Upneet

Dr Upneet Kaur  |35 Answers  |Ask -

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Mar 03, 2025

Dr Upneet Kaur is a medical professional and therapist based out of Amritsar.
After completing her bachelor’s degree in Ayurvedic medicine and surgery from the SKSS Ayurvedic College and Hospital, Sarabha, Punjab, in 2008, she worked as a medical officer at various multi-specialty hospitals in Punjab, handling both physical and mental patient care and clinical decision-making. She spent the next decade leading multidisciplinary teams at various levels.
Since 2022, she has been practising as a clinical psychologist and marriage counsellor.
Dr Upneet also holds an MBA in hospital management from Alagappa University, Tamil Nadu, and an MA in psychology from the Indira Gandhi National Open University.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 27, 2025Hindi
Relationship

Dear Dr Upneet My Wife was having breast Pain Since 1.5 years, we consulted her gynaecea she advised for mammography and in mammography there were two test one done by solely a female staff and another was done by a male staff in presence of a female staff where she has exposed herself and I totally ignored this or gave consent as this was her medical need and as a result we came to know this is due to hormonal changes as she is going to be 40 shortly or she is going to have menopause shortly. We consulted homeopathic doctors and get relief until she intakes medicine only and felt pain again when medicine ends, this December/2024 she again asked that she is having pain and I asked her to consult lady doctor and we went to government hospital and went to breast department but due to non-availability of duty doctor we were advised to consult surgery department and we found a male doctor there. I submit our OPD slip and as this was a male doctor, so I worn my wife to ask me before obeying doctor. On our turn my wife told her problem and doctor ask her to come behind curtain and she went behind curtain without asking me. Behind the curtain doctor asked her to show her breast and she was going to pull her bra up, but I suddenly reached and shout (In Our Mother Tongue ) and stopped this and get my mind lost due to this shock. Then doctor asked me what happened I totally ignored him as I was in intention to talk with my wife and take her back. Then doctor asked her why she stopped and what I said, my wife said that he is asking for female staff and doctor said “I am a doctor and I am not having female staff and there is nothing male and female in doctor’s consultation” my wife got convinced and told me that we are continuing with this doctor I also Shaked my head as consent sign but not aware with the upcoming surprise and then she open her upper body part and doctor did whatever a husband does And I was not ready for this So, I am still in trauma due to this, but I don’t want her to show her body to any male doctor. That picture comes again and again in my eyes. I was in depression for one month and still in trauma. I have done violence once also and our relation is bitter now. My wife was not having pain on that day (as she agreed on asking) and she get her checkup by a female doctor 10 minutes after that incident and also after 3 days of that incident by a female doctor only. My Marriage is not arranged but one-sided love marriage (from my side) we know each other for 5 years before marriage and didn’t instead of proposing a girl directly I gave proposal of marriage through her mother and through one of my friend who is just like her brother. We have consulted with 3 male doctor before but they Just gave her medicine and nothing else, even she went alone sometime but never happened like this and I was also comfort, but act on that day was totally disgusting and unfavourable. As per my opinion as an example in (a+b)whole square and (a-b) whole square having distinguish sign in (2ab) in the same way consulting a male doctor and a female doctor should be distinguish unless an emergency and unavailability of female doctor in any circumstances We have two daughters one is going to 20 by September and another is going to 15 by October and she has started honouring another paralleling disobeying me since before 2020. And get this thing realized to her 6 days before that incident and she fight on that This act of disobeying was fade due to love among us but now recalled after this incident. Now as our relation is bitter now and I am in a dilemma whether to continue with that type of character or get separated. I am not going to compensate on the ground of character shown by her but unaware of law. Please advise. A part from this as you may be a sikh we are connected with Gurbani and Gurmukhi. With the gurus blessing I am damn good in Gurmukhi reading and have taken hukumnama in 2022. And My wife also learnt Gurmukhi in 2022 and having nem of 2 or 3 banis. JAP, SO-DAR and perhaps sohilla Bani Says "Khasam wisare te kamjaat" "Khasam wisaar khuari keeni" As this incident come again and again in my eyes Bani Says "Ant Kaal Jo Istri Simre aisi chinta mein je mare, besua jon wal wal autare" So she demolished the trust and my remaining life as well as the life after death. While writing the above message i can recall aboves only. Please advise whether to live together or get seperated

Ans: Hello sir,
This incident was not your wife's mistake. As doctors, our intentions are pretty clear while we are dealing with the patients. But of course there are some rules and regulations of medical practice. This is a rule that whenever patient is female and doctor is male then a female staff or attendant should be there for examination.
But if in case it was done without female staff, in that case also your wife is not at fault. Secondly breast examination is done only after touching and properly examining the breasts. It's a normal procedure. So plz don't bring this in your mind and continue to live with your partner happily. I hope your dilemma is gone now. Take care !
Regards
Dr Upneet kaur
Reach me: https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet
Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4448 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 20, 2025

Listen
My JEE main CRL rank is 37000 and and OBC rank is 10442 Will I get Electronics or Mechanical at tier 1 Nit's
Ans: Dear Tilak, Here is, How to Predict Your Chances of Admission into NIT or IIIT or GFTI After JEE Main Results – A Step-by-Step Guide.

Providing precise admission chances for each student can be challenging. Some reputed educational websites offer ‘College Predictor’ tools where you can check possible college options based on your percentile, category, and preferences. However, for a more accurate understanding, here’s a simple yet effective 9-step method using JoSAA’s past-year opening and closing ranks. This approach gives you a fair estimate (though not 100% exact) of your admission chances based on the previous year’s data.

Step-by-Step Guide to Check Your Admission Chances Using JoSAA Data
Step 1: Collect Your Key Details
Before starting, note down the following details:

Your JEE Main percentile | Convert the Percentile to AIR, based on the Formula available in Google.
Your category (General-Open, SC, ST, OBC-NCL, EWS, PwD categories)
Preferred institute types (NIT, IIIT, GFTI)
Preferred locations (or if you're open to any location in India)
List of at least 3 preferred academic programs (branches) as backups (instead of relying on just one option)
Step 2: Access JoSAA’s Official Opening & Closing Ranks
Go to Google and type: JoSAA Opening & Closing Ranks 2024
Click on the first search result (official JoSAA website).
You will land directly on JoSAA’s portal, where you can enter your details to check past-year cutoffs.
Step 3: Select the Round Number
JoSAA conducts five rounds of counseling.
For a safer estimate, choose Round 4, as most admissions are settled by this round.
Step 4: Choose the Institute Type
Select NIT, IIIT, or GFTI, depending on your preference.
If you are open to all types of institutes, check them one by one instead of selecting all at once.
Step 5: Select the Institute Name (Based on Location)
It is recommended to check institutes one by one, based on your preferred locations.
Avoid selecting ‘ALL’ at once, as it may create confusion.
Step 6: Select Your Preferred Academic Program (Branch)
Enter the branches you are interested in, one at a time, in your preferred order.
Step 7: Submit and Analyze Results
After selecting the relevant details, click the ‘SUBMIT’ button.
The system will display Opening & Closing Ranks of the selected institute and branch for different categories.
Step 8: Note Down the Opening & Closing Ranks
Maintain a notebook or diary to record the Opening & Closing Ranks for each institute and branch you are interested in.
This will serve as a quick reference during JoSAA counseling.
Step 9: Adjust Your Expectations on a Safer Side
Since Opening & Closing Ranks fluctuate slightly each year, always adjust the numbers for safety.
Example Calculation:
If the Opening & Closing Ranks for NIT Delhi | Mechanical Engineering | OPEN Category show 8622 & 26186 (for Home State), consider adjusting them to 8300 & 23000 (on a safer side).
If the Female Category rank is 34334 & 36212, adjust it to 31000 & 33000.
Follow this approach for Other State candidates and different categories.
Pro Tip: Adjust your expected rank slightly lower than the previous year's cutoffs for realistic expectations during JoSAA counseling.

Can This Method Be Used for JEE April & JEE Advanced?
Yes! You can repeat the same steps after your April JEE Main results to refine your admission possibilities.
You can also follow a similar process for JEE Advanced cutoffs when applying for IITs.

Want to Learn More About JoSAA Counseling?
If you want detailed insights on JoSAA counseling, engineering entrance exams, preparation strategies, and engineering career options, check out EduJob360’s 180+ YouTube videos on this topic!

Hope this guide helps! All the best for your admissions!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know more on 'Careers | Health | Money | Relationships'.

...Read more

Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4448 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Apr 19, 2025

Career
Sir I have 138472 rank in jee mains 90.66 prcntile general category female outside delhi . Sir what can i get in JAC Delhi in any round or spot round . Can I get IIIT Delhi or any other ?
Ans: Manoj, IIIT Delhi, through JAC Delhi, places more importance on candidates from Delhi, especially in the highly competitive CSE field. The admission requirements for IIIT-D use JEE Main scores plus bonus points, giving more weight to candidates from Delhi. The cutoffs for outside Delhi General branches like CSE, CSAM, and CSB are typically in the top 30k to 50k places. IIIT-Delhi is out of reach even in spot rounds with your rank of 138k. Other JAC Delhi colleges include DTU, NSUT, IIIT-D, and IGDTUW (only for women). IGDTUW is a good choice for women, as fields like ME, ECE, and IT sometimes close at 70k-90k ranks but rarely go above 100k. At 138k rank, the chances are very low even for IGDTUW.

Back-up plans include CSAB special rounds, private universities/colleges that take your JEE rank. With a 90.66 percentile, you have a good chance of getting into good colleges/universities in CSE or ECE during state quota rounds. The final answer is IIIT-Delhi: ? At rank 138k, it's not possible. Other JAC Delhi schools, like IGDTUW: Not likely at all, not even in spot rounds

Pay attention to CSAB, State Counseling, and Private Colleges.

n order to produce a predetermined schedule of NITs/GFTIs/IIITs to which your rank will qualify for admission, here is, How to Predict Your Chances of Admission into NIT or IIIT or GFTI After JEE Main Results – A Step-by-Step Guide.

Providing precise admission chances for each student can be challenging. Some reputed educational websites offer ‘College Predictor’ tools where you can check possible college options based on your percentile, category, and preferences. However, for a more accurate understanding, here’s a simple yet effective 9-step method using JoSAA’s past-year opening and closing ranks. This approach gives you a fair estimate (though not 100% exact) of your admission chances based on the previous year’s data.

Step-by-Step Guide to Check Your Admission Chances Using JoSAA Data
Step 1: Collect Your Key Details
Before starting, note down the following details:

Your JEE Main percentile | Convert the Percentile to AIR, based on the Formula available in Google.
Your category (General-Open, SC, ST, OBC-NCL, EWS, PwD categories)
Preferred institute types (NIT, IIIT, GFTI)
Preferred locations (or if you're open to any location in India)
List of at least 3 preferred academic programs (branches) as backups (instead of relying on just one option)
Step 2: Access JoSAA’s Official Opening & Closing Ranks
Go to Google and type: JoSAA Opening & Closing Ranks 2024
Click on the first search result (official JoSAA website).
You will land directly on JoSAA’s portal, where you can enter your details to check past-year cutoffs.
Step 3: Select the Round Number
JoSAA conducts five rounds of counseling.
For a safer estimate, choose Round 4, as most admissions are settled by this round.
Step 4: Choose the Institute Type
Select NIT, IIIT, or GFTI, depending on your preference.
If you are open to all types of institutes, check them one by one instead of selecting all at once.
Step 5: Select the Institute Name (Based on Location)
It is recommended to check institutes one by one, based on your preferred locations.
Avoid selecting ‘ALL’ at once, as it may create confusion.
Step 6: Select Your Preferred Academic Program (Branch)
Enter the branches you are interested in, one at a time, in your preferred order.
Step 7: Submit and Analyze Results
After selecting the relevant details, click the ‘SUBMIT’ button.
The system will display Opening & Closing Ranks of the selected institute and branch for different categories.
Step 8: Note Down the Opening & Closing Ranks
Maintain a notebook or diary to record the Opening & Closing Ranks for each institute and branch you are interested in.
This will serve as a quick reference during JoSAA counseling.
Step 9: Adjust Your Expectations on a Safer Side
Since Opening & Closing Ranks fluctuate slightly each year, always adjust the numbers for safety.
Example Calculation:
If the Opening & Closing Ranks for NIT Delhi | Mechanical Engineering | OPEN Category show 8622 & 26186 (for Home State), consider adjusting them to 8300 & 23000 (on a safer side).
If the Female Category rank is 34334 & 36212, adjust it to 31000 & 33000.
Follow this approach for Other State candidates and different categories.
Pro Tip: Adjust your expected rank slightly lower than the previous year's cutoffs for realistic expectations during JoSAA counseling.

Can This Method Be Used for JEE April & JEE Advanced?
Yes! You can repeat the same steps after your April JEE Main results to refine your admission possibilities.
You can also follow a similar process for JEE Advanced cutoffs when applying for IITs.

Want to Learn More About JoSAA Counseling?
If you want detailed insights on JoSAA counseling, engineering entrance exams, preparation strategies, and engineering career options, check out EduJob360’s 180+ YouTube videos on this topic!

Hope this guide helps! All the best for your admissions!

Follow RediffGURUS to Know more on 'Careers | Health | Money | Relationships'.

...Read more

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