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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |731 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 04, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Sep 03, 2025Hindi
Relationship

Hi, I am 32M. I never had any relationships in the past...One sided was there but I overcame it and focused on my work. One day in gym i came across a girl 23F, we connected on insta and started chatting. Eventually we fell in love, I know this doesn’t sound good due to the age gap. We dated, had good times and emotionally connected with each other a lot. Now while discussing something, she revealed that she is not a virgin. There was a guy in her society she met around 3 years back (when she was 19) and she was in one sided love with him. They never confessed their love to each other. And she is not in touch with him anymore it was long back. Also she said she had made out with another guy whom she met 1 month back during her classes, prior to meeting me. I was really hurt to listen all these. Like how all these things she is doing at this age. I accepted her and then we had good 2 months again. After 2 months, I got to know she was following the first guy on insta. When confronted she said she used to like to see him and his girlfriend together. She was really not in touch with the guy but she was just following him. It was hurtful to me. We had a big fight on this. They used to share intimate pics with each other too. After forcing her to tell everything about her past, she told that she used to flirt with lot of boys. First in junior college with best friend she shared intimate pics, then met with the guy she lost virginity with, then she met another friend she shared pics with. Then in last year, in classes she shared pics with friend, then again with someone and then she had a crush on some guy with whom she made out. She was connected with them on insta. Like no talks but she was following them and they followed her too. There were almost 6-7 guys she used to talk as friend and has shared intimate pics and she called it flirting. I was shocked to hear all these. I am still shocked. This is out of my mind. It is very difficult to accept that few boys have intimate pics of my girlfriend. She has been very very loyal to me since we are together. She never got this kind of love in her life. She is really super happy in this relationship. We are emotionally connected a lot. I have treated her like a child and I love her a lot. She comes from a good family. She says she has been in wrong circle and all her friends are like this only. She cried a lot and she regrets it deeply like what she has done and she wants to get out of all these. But if feel, a persons character never changes. There will be so cold moments in relationships In future, will she be able to manage herself and stay honest. I really doubt a lot. She is really good at heart like a family girl but her past is really really terrible I feel. I feel, even though I love her will I be able to accept her past. Do I deserve this ? Do my family deserve this ? But again I think of risking it all because she is really invested in this relationship and I feel very bad to break her heart. I come from a very traditional background and believe in sacred and pure form of love. But I feel I got trapped in something which I can’t leave and can’t have whole heartedly. I am not able to focus on my work and everything. It’s hurting me a lot. Should I accept her ac she is or moving on will be better for both of us, even though it might break her heart.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
People’s past doesn't define their present or what they will do in the future. It’s not fair of you to judge her by the things she did before you existed in her life. Also, it isn’t fair to decide her “character” based on what you think is right or wrong. But having said that, I also want to acknowledge that your thought process is different from hers and I understand that the pain that you are feeling right now is valid. All I can say is that if it really bothers you, please rethink this relationship. Staying with someone because you don’t want to break their heart never works out in the end. Eventually you will break her heart if you are unsure of this relationship. And sometimes, it can be difficult to let go of certain things; in your case, it’s your partner’s past. If you think you can never get over this, then it’s best to think hard about whether you want to continue or not right now, before it’s too late and you both get more emotionally involved and hurt.

Hope this helps.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |731 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Feb 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 08, 2025
Relationship
Me and my girlfriend we both are in relationship from about last 2 years (almost). After such a long time I got to know that she had 2 relationships before me that too she didn't told I got to know it by third person she was sexually involved too (not intercourse but yes other things with one of them)... When I asked her that why you didn't told anything to me before she said she was scared that if she'll tell it to me so I'll leave her and she really did not wanted that... She was scared to loose me. And she was still in contact with that guy and when I asked her that why you were still in contact with him (it's been around 3 years they got separated) so she says that she is like that only... She can't deny anyone because of her soft hearted nature but she did not had any feelings for him. She also said that once she even went to meet him when he requested to meet and also on the same she claims that her soft hearted nature has done that she wasn't able to deny. I loved her too much but now all these things are hurting me like anything. (She is my first relationship before her i never had anyone)
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are hurt and the complexities of the hearts might be difficult sometimes to grasp. The first reason for your sorrow, her past relationship, and the fact that she was physically intimate with them is not completely justifiable. Though I understand that you feel hurt because she did not disclose it to you, still it should not matter so much as to ruin your present relationship. And whether she will open up about such sensitive details is actually up to her. It has nothing to do with how much she loves you or trusts you. Please understand that.

Now coming to the next thing, the fact that she is still in touch with them and has even met one of them, that is slightly concerning. It would have been okay if she did that openly- please understand that I am not saying she should have asked for your permission, but rather discuss the same with you. Moreover, in a relationship, it is also important to understand how much your partner is comfortable with- goes for both men and women. If you are uncomfortable with her relationship with her exes, she should consider that. I would have said the same if the table was turned. I suggest you have a clear conversation with her and express how you feel about this situation- depending on how she reacts and how the conversation goes, you both can think about the next step.

Hope this helps.

..Read more

Shalini

Shalini Singh  |188 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Sep 02, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 02, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hi, I am 32M. I never had any relationships in the past...One sided was there but I overcame it and focused on my work. One day in gym i came across a girl 23F, we connected on insta and started chatting. Eventually we fell in love, I know this doesn’t sound good due to the age gap. We dated, had good times and emotionally connected with each other a lot. Now while discussing something, she revealed that she is not a virgin. There was a guy in her society she met around 3 years back (when she was 19) and she was in one sided love with him. They never confessed their love to each other. And she is not in touch with him anymore it was long back. Also she said she had made out with another guy whom she met 1 month back during her classes, prior to meeting me. I was really hurt to listen all these. Like how all these things she is doing at this age. I accepted her and then we had good 2 months again. After 2 months, I got to know she was following the first guy on insta. When confronted she said she used to like to see him and his girlfriend together. She was really not in touch with the guy but she was just following him. It was hurtful to me. We had a big fight on this. They used to share intimate pics with each other too. After forcing her to tell everything about her past, she told that she used to flirt with lot of boys. First in junior college with best friend she shared intimate pics, then met with the guy she lost virginity with, then she met another friend she shared pics with. Then in last year, in classes she shared pics with friend, then again with someone and then she had a crush on some guy with whom she made out. She was connected with them on insta. Like no talks but she was following them and they followed her too. There were almost 6-7 guys she used to talk as friend and has shared intimate pics and she called it flirting. I was shocked to hear all these. I am still shocked. This is out of my mind. It is very difficult to accept that few boys have intimate pics of my girlfriend. She has been very very loyal to me since we are together. She never got this kind of love in her life. She is really super happy in this relationship. We are emotionally connected a lot. I have treated her like a child and I love her a lot. She comes from a good family. She says she has been in wrong circle and all her friends are like this only. She cried a lot and she regrets it deeply like what she has done and she wants to get out of all these. But if feel, a persons character never changes. There will be so cold moments in relationships In future, will she be able to manage herself and stay honest. I really doubt a lot. She is really good at heart like a family girl but her past is really really terrible I feel. I feel, even though I love her will I be able to accept her past. Do I deserve this ? Do my family deserve this ? But again I think of risking it all because she is really invested in this relationship and I feel very bad to break her heart. I come from a very traditional background and believe in sacred and pure form of love. But I feel I got trapped in something which I can’t leave and can’t have whole heartedly. I am not able to focus on my work and everything. It’s hurting me a lot. Should I accept her ac she is or moving on will be better for both of us, even though it might break her heart.
Ans: Why are you thinking about the past, doing so you are messing up your now.
If you trust the person then do so 100% - let it not be half-baked.
Wishing you the best.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |731 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jun 16, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - May 20, 2026Hindi
Relationship
My boyfriend sometimes says things that really upset me, and I end up getting angry very quickly. For example, he may make a casual joke about my cooking or cleaning habits. He will sometimes compare me to someone else, or say something sarcastic in front of his friends. I am not prepared so it instantly triggers me. Even small or silly comments like 'you are just lazy' or ignoring something I told and reminded him weeks ago can make me lose my temper and react strongly. This is starting to affect our relationship and daily communication. I want to know how to deal with my anger issues, so there are less misunderstandings in love. How can I respond in a calmer way?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
First of all, it's great that you have identified the flaw in yourself and trying to rectify it. Now, the instances you shared sound like legit reasons to have a reaction but how you show it makes all the difference. Instead of shouting or picking a fight, as soon as you feel yourself getting angry, remove yourself from the situation for a while. For instance, if your partner is making a joke which doesn't sit right with you, just leave the room for a moment till your anger fades and you can think rationally whether the situation truly demanded that reaction. If you feel, yes, he was out of line, take your time and calm down first and then have an open conversation with him about how his jokes or comments make you upset. You are not the only one in the wrong here. Trust me, a calm conversation can sort out 90% of the daily problems we face.

Hope this helps

...Read more

Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |8243 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 16, 2026

Career
Hello sir.Just wanted to ask you a few questions as I am very much confused as to what should I choose.I qualified for jee advanced this year with 96.4 percentile but could not clear advanced.Based on jee mains I am getting ece in allahabad gfti JK university and lmnit jaipur cse.Also I am getting dual and 3+2 course in bits pilani with a score of 207 in BITSAT.I am getting CSE at viteee with a rank of 8302 and CSE at MIT manipal main campus with a rank of 163 .Also I am the topper of my school with 96 percent in class 12 boards this year.I am awaiting the results from NUS NTU HKU . Also I have got offer letters for CS BTech course from University of Manchester, Edinburgh, Warwick, Durham and Bristol.Also I am getting CSE at Shiv Nadar university and SRM University Chennai.It will be very kind of you to guide me as to what should I take.I belong from general category.
Ans: If your family can comfortably afford UK fees and living costs, choose The University of Manchester CS over LNMIIT, Manipal, VIT, SRM, Shiv Nadar, etc options. For other options, the preference order may be: NUS/NTU > BITS Pilani Dual > LNMIIT CSE > Manipal CSE. If you want a straightforward 4-year CSE path, LNMIIT CSE is the safest choice among your current confirmed Indian options. Don't work with lot of options, which creates a lot of confusion. First decide, do you want to study in abroad or in India? Once it is decided, rest of the options can be easily worked out as mentioned in my reply.

Good luck.
Follow me if you receive this reply.
Radheshyam

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |12111 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jun 16, 2026

Career
My son has secured 3395 rank in JEE MAINS and 7535 rank in JEE ADVANCED. Should he choose Plain CS or CS with AI &DS in IIIT Bangalore? He is also getting IIIT Allahabad in 1st round of JOSSA counselling , CSE in DTU Delhi ,most likely to be upgraded to Plain CS / CS with AI in IIIT Delhi in subsequent rounds of JAC Delhi counselling. He also has chance to get 5 year integrated MS in CS from IIIT Hyderabad and very liitle chance to get Btech admission in EC branch at IIIT Hyderabad. So can you be kind enough to please advice on the order of preference for a bright future. Thanks and Regards
Ans: Rajesh Sir, the order of preference could be (1) IIIT Hyderabad Integrated MS in CS, (2) IIIT Allahabad IT/CSE, (3) IIIT Bangalore Plain CS, (4) IIIT Bangalore CS with AI&DS (5) IIIT Delhi Plain CS / CS with AI, (6) DTU Delhi CSE, & (7) IIIT Hyderabad ECE. It is generally advisable to choose the core CSE branch initially rather than specialized streams. After completing the second year, your son will have more clarity about his interests and can then focus on upgrading his skills through specializations, minors, relevant projects, or internships. This approach allows flexibility to adapt to evolving job market trends and personal preferences, ensuring he builds a strong foundation while tailoring his expertise to areas that offer the best career opportunities. All the Best for Your Son's Prosperous Future!

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