
I am 27 years old, and I have 20 Lakh in personal loan that I had given to my brother for his business. His business did not go well and all money just vanished. Also, my mom had given him 10 lakhs keeping her gold as a collectral. Also my brother took loan from other family members of around 10 Lakhs, which I am liable to pay.
I need to pay all these loans because, he himself has taken around 60lakhs from bank and he lost all of that and there is no possible way for him to pay this loan (My personal loan, mom gold loan and family members loan) as well.
My salary is 1Lakh per month and 51,000 directly goes to Loan EMI. Apart from that, i spend around 30,000 for rent, groceries, travel, shopping, bill payment and others. Currently there is no savings, I am planning to get married in next 3 years, I need atleast 8 lakh for both marriage and engagement. Also, i need to atleast do some minimum modification for my dad built home like buying furniture, painting, reparing costs that costs around 5 lakh.
The maximum amount that I can save us around 20,000. I am not sure what to do. Please help
Ans: – You have faced a tough family situation with honesty.
– Many hide or delay in such matters.
– You are facing it now. That is very important.
– You are taking responsibility. That shows maturity and strength.
– With proper steps, even this problem can be solved over time.
» Understanding your present money position
– Salary is Rs.1 lakh per month.
– Rs.51,000 goes to loan EMIs.
– Rs.30,000 goes to monthly living.
– Rs.20,000 is left as potential savings.
– There are also upcoming needs like marriage and home repairs.
– Family loans and gold loan also create pressure.
– Brother’s loans are not in your control.
– Bank loans and family dues now sit on your head.
» Identifying priority areas
– First, protect your essential needs.
– Food, rent, medical, basic transport should always continue.
– Second, stop any new expenses that are not essential.
– Third, restructure debts for relief.
– Fourth, plan marriage and home work only after debt under control.
– Fifth, avoid new loans for non-essential purposes.
» Managing your debt situation step by step
– You need to combine some loans if possible.
– A personal loan top-up or balance transfer at lower rate can help.
– If interest rates differ widely, bring them together under one lower rate.
– A structured repayment plan can reduce EMI burden and free cash flow.
– Some banks allow tenure extension to reduce monthly EMI pressure.
– This gives breathing space to build a buffer.
– Discuss with banks about hardship restructuring. They sometimes allow step-up EMIs.
» Handling family obligations
– Family loans are emotional. But you must treat them as financial liabilities.
– Talk openly with family members.
– Explain your cash flow and commitments.
– Create a repayment timeline with them.
– Avoid paying everything at once by borrowing more.
– Negotiate partial settlements or phased repayment.
– Most relatives will understand if you are transparent and sincere.
» Managing your mother’s gold loan
– Gold loan has collateral. The gold is at risk.
– Try to repay this loan first if interest rate is high.
– Gold is an emotional asset, not just financial.
– If needed, restructure it into a personal loan at lower rate.
– Once gold is released, you can keep it safe for family security.
» Saving for marriage and home repairs
– Marriage budget of Rs.8 lakh is big under current load.
– Reduce wedding costs if possible.
– Small, simple marriage now can save stress.
– Any saved money can reduce debt.
– Home repairs of Rs.5 lakh can wait till stability returns.
– Focus on safety repairs only. Luxury changes can be postponed.
– Avoid mixing loans for marriage or home upgrades now.
» Building an emergency buffer
– With all pressure, a safety net is missing.
– Even Rs.50,000 in bank can help during sudden needs.
– Use the Rs.20,000 monthly savings to build small emergency fund first.
– After that, direct it towards debt prepayment.
– Do not start new investments till loans are under control.
» Emotional and behavioural money control
– Say no to unnecessary expenses for next 2–3 years.
– Stop any lending to others, even family, until you are stable.
– Keep your partner informed before marriage. Transparency builds trust.
– Avoid guilt for brother’s mistakes. You are already helping beyond duty.
– Keep mental health strong. Money stress can harm decision-making.
– Small progress every month will build confidence.
» Long-term investment preparation
– Once debt pressure reduces, investments must start.
– Use mutual funds through MFD with CFP guidance for growth.
– Avoid direct funds. They do not provide guidance or handholding.
– Regular funds with CFP support give rebalancing, review, and tax optimisation.
– Active mutual funds beat market average over time with right selection.
– Index funds lack protection in falling markets. They follow market down fully.
– Active funds help handle risk better for long-term wealth creation.
» Retirement and future goals
– After clearing debt, save at least 25% of salary.
– Split into equity mutual funds, PPF, and small emergency fund.
– Review goals every year with a Certified Financial Planner.
– This ensures you stay on track even if income or expenses change.
– Keep gold or property for emotional needs only, not primary investments.
– Do not repeat high-risk family funding.
– Help only from surplus, never from core savings or loans.
» Professional support importance
– You have many moving parts: debt, marriage, family, and future.
– A Certified Financial Planner can create a debt repayment and savings path.
– They will help you with restructuring, negotiation, and asset allocation.
– This reduces pressure and increases clarity.
– You do not have to solve everything alone.
» Finally
– You are already on the right track by asking for guidance.
– You have income, willpower, and time. These three can fix this.
– First, secure essentials, then reduce debt pressure.
– Next, build small savings and emotional stability.
– Later, plan marriage within a budget you can handle.
– Finally, shift focus to long-term investments for wealth and retirement.
– With discipline, you can recover from this phase fully.
– Keep patience and steady action. Big problems need steady, small solutions.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment